That's the only word for it. I feel drained. Not tired. Emotionally, mentally, drained. Like I can't take anything else. Like I could sleep for a month. Like getting in to bed and just not getting out again. Like even smiling, talking, eating, is too much hassle. Two funerals in three days. I know I didn't know the people very well, but they have drained me so much. Tuesdays' did because I was so worried about my Dad and was trying to be super nice and friendly to all his family who I haven't seen in years. Todays' one was hard because it actually DID upset me. A lot. I was about to cry and I looked to my left and saw my little cousin crying...so I went into my usual "must look after them, must be strong" mode and was there for her. Then I noticed my aunt crying too, so I made my Mum go and look after her while I kept an eye on my cousin. Finally got out of the funeral...feeling like I was about to cry and I hear my old next door neighbour talking to my Mum about the night my Nan died. :dry: Then when she saw me she started talking to me too. Saying that she can't walk past a red cardigan without thinking of my Nan. That sometimes she thinks she can still hear my Nan in the house. That she's still there. And chatted about Nan's funeral too. I didn't need that. I can't take very much more. I'm not depressed. I'm not suicidal. I don't even know what I am. Just tired. Tired of it all. I want a break. I want things to be easy for a while. I want things to be normal. I want to be left alone for a few days to just ...... be alone. I don't know how much more I can take. I'm snapping at everyone. I'm leaning on people too much...One person in particular...I'm not eating unless i'm forced. I'm drinking. I'm sleeping too much.