I knew exactly how it was going to end, but I still decided to tell the guy who was a staff member at my camp and 4 years older than me that I had a crush on him. Because I have zero balls I wrote him a note, and I thought he was going to talk to me and at least let me know somehow of his rejection. Days had passed, and nothing. We were friends on facebook and he had my email so there was no way he couldn't reach me. My friend was there when I left the note next to his things, and she decided he probably didn't see it, so he didn't know. So, instead of being a normal human being and pretending it never happened, I again wrote him a message, this time on facebook, and asked him to write me back. He did, and he didn't say he didn't like me, but instead just said there were reasons why we couldn't be together. I know he doesn't like me, but the annoying little voice in my head tells me otherwise. It claims that he just doesn't want to get in trouble with the people at the camp, since there is such an age difference. Things like this have happened before, so I thought I'd get over it and be okay, but that's not happening. Instead, I stayed in bed until 2 this afternoon, and I've felt like crying since then. I decided to unfriend him on facebook so I won't see what he's writing, but I will have to face him Saturday when the older kids and staff from my camp take a day trip to New York. I will also be seeing the ex boyfriend that completely ruined my life for over a year after we broke up because he's that much of a dick. I think I'm so upset over this rejection because its about the 2 year anniversary of when my ex and I started dating, and I will not only be single, but newly rejected, and I will have to face both heartbreakers together. I'm slightly terrified. The older boy who recently rejected me is the nicest boy ever, so I'm not afraid of anything like that, but I don't want his pity, or him trying too hard to keep our friendship or trying to make me feel better. I know he'll try to do that. And then I'll be ready to cry and my ex will be there with that stupid smirk across his face... I'm not looking forward to this New York trip, and all the heartbreak I'll have to face with it.