Dying-how bad can it be?

[katmandu1]

I've been doing a lot of thinking about dying and what it may be like. I wonder if it's the same feeling you have when you are so tired you can't keep your eyes open...no matter how hard you try. That wouldn't be so bad. Just letting go and then.....nothing.

God knows I haven't anything to really stay alive for. I get very little satisfaction from being alive, in fact I'm bored with life...I've been trying to make changes in my life for over 16 years, but I just can't seem to change anything. Each day runs into the last...each month into the last month :sad:. Maybe there IS no grand purpose or meaning to life after all. I know there isn't one for my life. Maybe death is actually a reward for putting up with life! All I know is, I'm so fucking tired of being alive!! Tired, bored, useless and meaningless...that's me. Can death be any worse?

 

[katy101]

i dont know honestly
but u sound like a kind person
so i know its hard but dont give up on hope i guess

 

[fromthatshow]

Do you have a therapist who can talk you through this?
Why nothing has worked for so long?
A good therapist can really help :hug:

 

[poisonedresistance]

I think everyone at one point or another, or maybe even several times throughout their life contemplates the meaning of life and the finalization/or moving on of death.

Trouble is there are never any answers.

Some people turn to religion, some people make up their own, but at the end of the day the only true fact is that death is a part of life, however and whenever it comes.

 

[plates]

I've experienced dying in every sense of the word. Dying, meaning, I saw myself dead, I saw darkness right in front of me and that my days were very limited because of the severity of depression I'd been going through which was very much linked to how people treated me at my mental health clinic and injuries from my past and my relationships.

I was also dying a couple of years ago for months- in the sense I was very physically ill and it took me a long time to recover fully from that and I had very little help.

....it's agonising, full of fear and horrible. I'm talking about physical death here, not an intangible/ intellectual idea of 'death' and cycles of life. I'm talking about when you can't breathe, you're going to kill yourself in a matter of hours, and you've been screaming in every single possible way to say alive for months prior, to healthcare providers who would rather aid your death/silence than help you.

 

[darkrider]

Depression is like a wave coming over me. When I attempt I imagine it will feel like i'm going under, smothered, but when I pass over it will all be silent and everything will be behind me. My whole body will feel released for the first time. Goodbye blue sky...