im afraid 2 post here because of wat u might think. But I am on the verge of being suicidal, idk wat 2 do with myself Ok here's the story. Now there r these 2 beautiful girls that i'm related to (they're twins but don't look alike, u can easily tell them apart). Im not related 2 them by blood, just by marriage. My brother married there aunt, and idk wat that makes us but we just consider each other cousins cause its easier (even tho we aren't even close to cousins). Im 2 and 1/2 years older then they r, im a senior and in HS and they're Freshman (if it matters). Ive known them for about 5 months. I also work with them at a grocery store Anyways I called one of them and told them how i felt. I didn't tell her right away, i was actually just playfully teasing her at first (2 like ease the tension and make it seem less serious so maybe she wouldn't feel as weird). Well she ended up figureing out it was indeed her and her sister that i liked (and i explained that i didn't want 2 liek 2 people but i don't control who i like and who i don't) She told me she feels a little weird cause we're cousins and the family might not agree with it, and i totally feel the same way. She hung up and said she would call me in 5 minutes but never did the next day, I ended up texting one of them and we ended up trading texts. Basicly she told me that she felt weird and that there was nothing i could do. The last thing I said in a text was (pretty much word for word) "Look I just want both of u 2 know that I really care about u, as friends and cousins, not just crushes. I'll always be here 4 u and i hope this doesn't get in the way of our relationship. Ok i'll leave u alone now". She responded with "ok i understand" and that was the end of it. In work 2day i didn't say anything 2 them and they didn't say anything 2 me which is how it usually is anyways since there isn't really any time to talk during work. But of course knowing me i thought it was because of all thats happened. I just dont know wat 2 do with myself. Do u know wat its like 2 care about som1 (in this case 2 people) so much and they could care less about u? i could die right now and I bet u it wouldn't affect them at all. They probably wouldn't even be at my funeral. It just burns a hole inside of me idk wat 2 do from here, im just hoping 2 hear good things (but dont let that influence wat u say). Be hoenst with me, i know they could care less about me, its ok u can tell me im right like i know i am.