Embarrassment

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by Sashi0, Nov 2, 2007.

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  1. Sashi0

    Sashi0 Well-Known Member

    I apologize in advance if I am possibly making an inappropriate thread.

    I have never met others that cut themselves, I used to always be told I wanted attention and was a brat. I couldn't stop and I would always hear how pathetic and ridiculous I was, a spoiled bratty attention wanting individual. I searched online for answers to cutting, but whenever I would find a website, whenever people were cutting themselves, they would show them off, saying how beautiful it is... I felt all alone because I on the other hand am embarrassed.

    I hate the scars, I hate being this way. I feel weak and stupid but I can't stop, it's to the point I hate myself...Am I on my own??
     
  2. Abby Rose

    Abby Rose Well-Known Member

    No you are not alone. A lot of people are in the same position you are in now. The act of cutting is a way for people to take the internal pain they are suffering from and then take that pain, and relieve it in an external act. Because of their actions, some people believe that they are bettering themselves by finding an outlet for their suffering. But most people, like me realize in one way or another that this is not getting to the route of their problems and are regretful after the fact and see the scars as an embarrassing reminder of their pain. At least you have the intelligence to see that whatever immediate we get from cutting ourselves, it doesn’t solve the real issues at hand.
     
  3. Nessa Doll

    Nessa Doll Member

    No you are not alone. I look at my arms and I feel so angry and ashamed of myself. I would never be proud of it or think it is beautiful. I know how you feel :hug::hug: But the fact that you do this to yourself does not make you a spoiled brat or an attention seeker. I am sorry that the peoepl who have said that to you havnt relised that the fact that you do that to yourself means you just need some help:sad: I am here for you anytime you need somebody to talk to just drop me a line pm and what not :hug: :hug: Love Nessa xoxox
     
  4. Lucie

    Lucie Well-Known Member

    A few years ago my sister found my razors and called me pathetic. and that made me want to do it even more. :(
     
  5. Nessarose

    Nessarose Well-Known Member

    I used to cut, and I confessed to my cousin when I found out she did as well. It's weird, because I've always hated blood. Both my cousin and I hid the marks. I cut my legs and bruised them and wore pants, and my cousin wore long sleeves. I suspected she was hurting herself but I was too afraid to ask and avoided it. Bad decision on my part; always avoiding things.

    Except, I've never felt guilty about self-harm. For me, it is not an outlet, because other people do not harm me physically or mentally; it's just a form of self-punishment, and it makes me feel that I've disciplined myself, even if it's an illusion. However, I *am* humiliated when other people find out or see marks. I got really mad at myself once and started going for my wrists. It was much more visible and that made things difficult. I like to keep reminders for myself so I don't make the same mistakes, but I don't like when other people find out, if that makes sense. It makes me feel foolish and weak. This probably doesn't make sense but I'm not a logical person.

    Again, it's been a while since I've done this. On one hand, it seems like a good thing, but on the other, I feel like I've let myself go and indulge.
     
  6. Sashi0

    Sashi0 Well-Known Member

    No not at all I get what you are saying. :smile: It is a good thing, you are not harming yourself.
     
  7. the_juggalo

    the_juggalo Account Closed

    dont be Embarrassed alot people cut them self i got cuts down both my arms alot people do it i dont cut that much anymore i smoke weed or take anti depersion pills or i talk it out with someone! your not alone :smile:
     
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