Embracing The Triggers-Testing My Strength

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by Godsdrummer, Sep 10, 2009.

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  1. Godsdrummer

    Godsdrummer Guest

    All of those things that made me want to drink.
    All of those things that made me want to die.
    All of those things that made me want to smoke.

    I am going back to my old life, to embrace all of that stuff. And I am going to do it without the benefit of meds!

    Why????!!!!

    Because I want to see how strong I really am. Or am I just a pussy afterall.

    Time to seperate the men from the boys!
     
  2. Robin

    Robin Guest

    Sleeping dogs are best left sleeping :) There's no reason why you should test yourself again, you already seem to have beaten some terrible demons while really down on your knees, you're not going to better that acheivement at full strength :)
     
  3. Godsdrummer

    Godsdrummer Guest

    I know...I just want my life back as it was before the alcohol, before the depression, before all of it.
     
  4. Robin

    Robin Guest

    Then why go back to something that caused pain and heartache :) You've suffered enough, time to get on with things you always wanted to do now :)
     
  5. Godsdrummer

    Godsdrummer Guest

    YOu can never go back, that's what they say. And I know what that means.

    Sigh....I just wish none of this crap had ever happened.
     
  6. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    Bill who are you trying to prove this too? Go back to your 1st thread or post here. Then skip a couple of months and keep going like that. Read them hun and you'll see you are definitiely a "man". You fought hard and came out ahead, maybe not fully defeating your demons but kicking their asses and putting them in their places for sure!!! And read the kind, thoughtful and intelligent words you have offered others to help them in their private fights as well. You are past the proving point. Now you can reap the rewards and move on. You can have that life before the all the pain. But it all takes steps of courage and determination. Both of which you already possess Bill. So let the past stay the past and make the future one that will show the world just how strong a man you are!!! And if you really want to enjoy it, let that little boy out once in a while for some fun. It's so unfortunate that we rarely see in ourselves what others so readily find. I see a strong, courageous, generous, caring, intelligent person in your posts. Some one that others want to be able to find your path and travel along it with you. Keep going Bill. No time nor need to turn back now!!!
     
  7. Godsdrummer

    Godsdrummer Guest

    Thanks!!!

    You brought a tear to me eyes! lol
     
  8. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    You don't need to dig into the past to try and prove something to yourself or anyone else. You've already proven how strong you are, time and time again. You can't change the past, but you can control a lot of what happens to you in the future.
     
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