I'm very emotional. I have BDP. It's the same. To me. I'm so sad my mother died. It was 17 years ago, I was 11, but still. What a void. I'm so sad and depressed Kim Manners died. I'm so angry at my father. I'm so angry at Chris Carter. I'm so empty. I drink, I cut, I take meds, therapy. But it's still here. I so love Fox. I so love Mulder. I'm all passionate. When you see me... people find me cold, but I'm so deep, and so hurt. Some day, some hour, I so want to live, and then I so want to die. I lost a child, adopted, I so hate myself. I so hate myself, for I was borne.