Emotions

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by total eclipse, Nov 20, 2009.

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  1. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I was doing so well but then memories emotions therapy words mind doesn't shut down god i hate it when i go back i hate being her so much this is what dam emotions do to people set them off makes them so sad i hate being sad because i don't want to be here when i remember Its too hard.
     
  2. Scully

    Scully Well-Known Member

    I have similar moments. But it's there you learn the more (therapist said so, not me, about yourself, what makes you what you are). I hate to feel like that too. Do you feel guilty? I hope you get better soon.
     
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Not really guilt just anger pain saddness so much hate towards her im not her i will never be her again. dam emotions dam it screw up everything. thaks for your response i know too many of us struggle with dam emotion of the past I just want stay in present where i am someone.
     
  4. Tam

    Tam Well-Known Member

    Ambushed by the past - I can relate to that Violet. I hope you are doing ok with it, getting those feelings under control :hug:
     
  5. jxdama

    jxdama Staff Member Safety & Support

    best wishes to you!!
     
  6. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

  7. Scully

    Scully Well-Known Member

    It's good to struggle, and it's good to write it down here. Are a bit better today?
     
  8. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hey i have been keeping busy today with my daughter. and helping husband clean up a bit. My daughter and i put out xmas lights so that took some time. I am okay as i am not thinking thanks for inquiring yes i understand no pain no gain I am sure in time it will get easier i hope take care of you ok thanks again
     
  9. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    i am not her iam not her iam not her i hate me so much oh god ihate me so ffffmuch why did he bring me back there i can't handle these emotions its not me falling apart its her she is so weak stupid stupid stupid i want her gone i don't want this i just can't do this iam not strong enough. I beat the past i left it behind i wiped it out of my memory i can do it again iwill not go back i can't it is making me worse not better. why don't they understand how it makes you worse not better.
     
  10. Tam

    Tam Well-Known Member

    Hey Violet :hug: It sounds like your therapist is trying to get you to go into the past to sort things out? Hang in there, you know what's best for you even if what they say is supposed to help, sometimes you need to back off to save yourself. Thinking of you.
     
  11. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Thanks im okay just not sleeping now this to will pass
     
  12. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I feel guilty for some things the aftermath
     
  13. Dharma4815162342

    Dharma4815162342 Well-Known Member

    If you're not happy with your therapy then why put up with it? Not that I'm an expert or anything. I am a psychology major though and it doenst seem like making you re-hash your past is an effective treatment. Dealing with any problems you have now is what will be most effective and letting the past where it is. Sometimes experiences from our past can cause problems for us now in our lives and then they need to be dealt with. IDK-but if you're not satisfied with your treatment I would discuss it with your therapist. It should make you feel better not worse!
     
  14. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    My therapist is very kind very good at what he does It is me struggling to accept everything To me the past is the past and i cannot undue theharm done to her i can only forget it and say it didn't matter i understand and hold no hate really just pain comes up alot of pain. She has live through it once as a child she does not have to go there again. denial of everything is better as it keeps one safe one sane. My therapist believe i have not dealt with emotions of incidents but i see no reason to deal with emotions as logically i understand everything now it can end. Thanks for your post i may decide i have had enough therapy and just leave it at that. My therapist cared when noone else did he has never gotton mad no has he ever treated me like trash to be left side road like someone else did.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 22, 2009
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