Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by fms, May 27, 2009.

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  1. fms

    fms Well-Known Member

    That's exactly how I feel right now.
    I'm not hurting...
    I'm not upset...
    I think I'm past that stage now.
    I just feel empty.
    I want to die. Thinking about the future terrfies me, but I'm always being asked to make decisions about it.
    I just.. I don't see the point. I don't... I don't want a future. I don't want to live.
    Thing is, I promised a friend that I would ALWAYS be here for her, that I'd survive through anything for her...
    But will she hate me if I break that promise...
    I'm so lost... :sad:
  2. *sparkle*

    *sparkle* Staff Alumni


    Sorry you feel so bad :hug:

    Do you know why you're feeling this emptiness? What scares you about the future?

    I hope you are able to log in again soon and talk to people - that's what we are all here for - to help each other.

    Know that I am thinking of you,

  3. fms

    fms Well-Known Member

    I don't really know why.
    I think it's because.. well, lately everything from my past that I'd been denial about came back and it was only then that I had to start trying to deal with it.
    But I couldn't.
    I can't... :sad:
    And so... I can't feel... anything anymore.
    I've been hurting for so long.
    It's like I've just kinda given up now... :sad:

    Thanks :hug:
    It helps to know there are people here :smile:
  4. damaged goods

    damaged goods Active Member

    I know how you feel, and I think that vast emptiness is the worst feeling of all. At least when you are angry, you can use that energy constructively. Even when you're sad and crying all the time, at least you are feeling something, and releasing your emotions with the tears.

    What about the one friend you promised to always be here for? Can you reach out to her? Maybe she would understand. She might awaken some feeling in you, some feeling of being loved.
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