Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by freedom, Nov 23, 2011.

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  1. freedom

    freedom Well-Known Member

    I used to be a heroin addict. I started because of dpression. It was a quick fix for the symptoms. I've been clean for some time now, but I've never felt quite so empty. I worry I will return to addiction, it was the 'best' I ever felt, despite having an extremely poor quality of life. Not being able to find joy away from drugs concerns me greatly, especially as to what it says about my character. I don't consider myself a 'bad' person, I've always tried to do what's right, even if I have got lost or distorted along the way. It doesn't feel like I will ever find any happiness away from drugs and I wonder if I might be 'better off' an addict again. I want to be 'more' than that. I want to feel good, that I'm a 'good' person even, that I'm worth saving. But there's only a universe with nothing in it and no way of filling it. freedom
  2. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    acupuncture can be used effectively to treat addiction. it can be expensive though

    I don't know if an md can give you something

    where do you live?

    I think there may be some free recovery programs out there

    yes you are a good person and worth saving
  3. jimk

    jimk Staff Alumni

    Freedom.. the state which you describe on the heroin is an artifical state which is chemically induced.. it is not real and does not last.. the depression is more real and is very long lasting way too darn often.. have you tried any meds with the help of a professional to fight this??

    speaking personally as one who has fought severe depression for a very long time, i can say that the help adn the antidepressants have made life a whole heck of a lot better these days.. might do the same for you. also did drugs for many years myself.. a dead end road Freedom..

    hope you can keep your string without going and get some help fighting the depressioin.. tc, Jim
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