My dearest daughter, I've written this away, to hide my shame from the world. I want to be strong for you. I want to fight for you. I want to keep you strong and safe, away from the evil in this world. I love you so much princess. I know one day you will understand, the pain I go through everyday, just to keep strong for you. Please dont hate me for what I have done, I know they weren't the best decision, but they were the safest. I just want to protect you, I wish I could have been protected, but the worlds evil got to me too soon. I know one day you will hate me, it is always the way. Mummy is weak. She doesn't want to be. She wants to be strong for you, to help you, to car for you. I have been hurt so many times, that talking won't save me, but I hope you will. You have kept me going. Your smile your laugh, your cuddles. Each day I live, I live for you. I know it's so selfish of me, to use you like this princess, But I need to fight for you. Without you here I would die. No matter what, I will keep going... I will try to keep going, I will try so hard, just for you. To show to you that I can be strong. One day, my child, you will be proud of me. for how long I have kept going.