Hey guys, I made a diary called "Journey to Win", it is basically a diary documenting my life about my step-by-step process on overcoming my suicidal thoughts and anxiety inside my head. I met my best friend today, I loved her for 2 years, and maybe I found out that she loved someone else and doesn't interested in me. I'm a fragile guy, I deeply in love to her and by the time she rejected my love almost 2 months ago, I felt so horrible. From then, I realized my life was falling apart, I couldn't sleep very well, and I couldn't eat anything. I struggled so hard to forget about her, but every time I try, I always fail. I'm not sad because I've been rejected, I'm sad because I'm scared of seeing her with someone else. The more I try to forget about her, the worse my feelings are going to be. I'm sad because all the good memories with her just... disappeared. I can't recreate that, I can't make her or myself smile again, and the worst part is... I can't forgive myself for confessing to her. If only I didn't confess, maybe I felt so much better now. But it seems history is just a history, I can't change it and I will never change that one single thing in my life that I really want to change. I am weak, and my weakness makes me less attractive to her. I'm not the manliest man of all time, I'm not the strongest nor the best person she ever met. But from the deepest of my heart, I feel like I will do anything for her, I will try to be the best for her, but it seems I don't have a chance to do that. Maybe she's not reading this post, but I just really want to tell her that I really really love her. I can't describe how much I love her, I have never loved someone this much in my entire life. My journey has come to an end, and I lost.