End of the road

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Tonks, Nov 21, 2010.

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  1. Tonks

    Tonks Active Member

    If I fail a nursing class I am in, I am going to commit suicide. No ifs, ands, or buts. If I fail it, I am going to be pulled out of the nursing program. I have dedicated four years of my life to this. If I can't continue, it will all be for nothing. Wasted time. Wasted energy. Wasted money. Oh so much wasted money. I'll be no better off than the moment I left high school. There is nothing left for me. I don't want to flip burgers, I want to help people.

    At least I have a few weeks to get my affairs in order, if I am even allowed to continue in the class. It is up to the Dean of Nursing. Not much to it other than finding a home for my precious kitty.
     
  2. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Don't be so hard on yourself.. You have two weeks so cram cram cram...Get a tutor if you need to..After four years of dedicated work I am sure they would give you a second chance..
     
  3. Tonks

    Tonks Active Member

    I wish it were that easy. The class is actually a nursing clinical (hybrid class/time in hospital sort thing). I made an error on shift that resulted in getting sent home immediately. Nobody was hurt, but the result will probably be my expulsion from the program.
     
  4. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    can you take someone in with you to talk to the Dean someone that will stand up for you
    Any nurse can make an error it is the nurse that acknowledges her error and learns from it that succeeds.
    If there was no harm done then i cannot see why one error can cause an expulsion from all of nursing program.
    You are learning so errors will be made right Lets hope the Dean gives you another chance and if not don't waist 4 years by giving up keep going pushing forward until you have achieved your goal.
     
  5. Tonks

    Tonks Active Member

    The Dean already has all the facts. So now it is just a waiting game to see the final decision. If I can't finish nursing school, there is just nothing left for me to do. My gateway into the world, gone. Ending everything will save everyone time and energy. My dad already has deemed me a failure anyway, not long until everyone else thinks the same thing.
     
  6. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    4 years you have put in to this how can one mistake take that all away. The Dean needs to hear what happened and why was there too much commotion
    did you not receive help you needed when asked was there a critical event on the floor at the time all these things can add to errors being made. You will not be the first to make an error or the last The Dean needs to ensure you continue on but with help perhaps or less of a load at the hospital. i can 't see why the Dean would give up on you after giving 4 years of your life there. I hope all goes well let us know okay Don't be too hard on yourself okay mistakes happen they just do and you are no less a person because it did YOu are human okay and it is better it happens now so in the future you will know how to deal with them.
     
  7. Viro

    Viro Well-Known Member

    If you believe things will not go your way, you have nothing to lose by going to your Dean and explaining your side of the story.
     
  8. Tonks

    Tonks Active Member

    They haven't given me any info. Whether I should show up to the theory class on Monday for the clinical. What is the point though of going on anyway.

    I've already started gathering the documents I need to make everything smoother for my family. I'm so tired all the time so I can only do a little at a time, but they'll have what they need.
     
  9. just be the best doctor you can be
     
  10. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    hey tonks can you call early monday morning and find out what your status is? it must be terrible being in limbo like this.
     
  11. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    definitely show up on Monday to your theory class yes and go in and talk to whom ever it is and explain what happen If you did not get a call to not go in then you are expected to show up. Take care okay stay positive.
     
  12. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    How is it going did you have your meeting yet with Dean i hope all are working to do what is right for you. take care.
     
  13. lapazyelamor

    lapazyelamor Well-Known Member

    you need to put things in perspective some people have no jobs and make far worse mistakes than failing at a course, ive heard of people spending 7 years attaining a phd only to not work in that feild theres more to life than a job, some people have far more on their plate to deal with than that , you got plenty to live for
     
  14. Dave_N

    Dave_N Banned Member

    I really, really hope that Tonks passed his nursing exam. :unsure:
     
  15. Tonks

    Tonks Active Member

    I did meet, and had a simulation exam (using a mannequin) that was recorded for my nursing instructor to view with the Dean and another member of the nursing staff to decide if I can go to clinical on Friday or not. Not being allowed to go to clinical means a failure.

    All this waiting, especially when the semester is nearly over, is just hard to handle.
     
  16. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I hope it goes well Tonk i hope they come back with decisions soon Iunderstand how hard it must be but hang on okay. keep reaching out here
     
  17. Tonks

    Tonks Active Member

    The final verdict was failure. So yea, not really feeling too well at the moment.
     
  18. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    hi tonks i am really, really sorry to hear that. please don't do anything rash. sometimes a door is closed for reasons unknown to us, reasons that make no kind of sense at the time. please don't hurt yourself.
     
  19. Atompilz

    Atompilz Well-Known Member

    Hi Tonks
    I am so sorry to read all of this and sorry you are feeling this way. All is not lost I am sure. You say you want to help people, maybe it would be good to look at other possibilities of work where you can use the knowledge you have gained but where you don't actually need a nursing qualification. I am thinking of things like elderly folks home, care home for children with disabilities or special needs schools or helping out in foster homes or half way houses. There should be positions in these types of places where they would be really pleased to have someone with your knowledge and abilities and you are obviously a very caring person. Then you wouldn't feel that all your work was for nothing.

    Not sure about other countries but in the UK if a company is asked for references they are only allowed to give a good reference or abstain from giving one so what happened wouldn't have an affect on getting a new position. Anyway nobody got hurt and as previously said here everyone everyone makes mistakes and people just have to learn from them. My nurse friend once gave an injection in a kids arm as she couldn't remember where the Glutes were and was too afraid to ask. Nobody was hurt but she felt stupid when she found out but now she has gone on to become ward sister.

    Is there any other programme you could move to perhaps? Big hug to you please think about other possibilities.X
     
  20. Fitzy

    Fitzy Well-Known Member

    I made mistakes as a student nurse and left my course but I was able to learn from the experience and move on. You will survive this xxxxxxx
     
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