I really think with my whole heart that i was born to kill myself in the end. I been struggling with it for years and i think its time soon. I am not scared or sad, not angry or confused. I think its time. Only passion i have in life is my fiancee. He is the only thing keeping me to this place. I am annoyed at our relationship for that, i am too weak to sever it. I want to pack up my stuff, walk for days, enjoy the freedom a few more days before i end it. But he is holding me back. I will kill myself soon. I see no other point staying here i have no future. I am so tired of fighting off my fate.