Ending my life

[derek]

I'm a Scottish guy who has had enough of life.
I may not have the worst life comparing to others but i don't feel i can offer anyone anything more. I have 3 kids & 3 grandkids, with another one due in November, i know what people will say but to be honest my grandkids are too young to know me. I feel i'm just living the same day, every day, life is so mundane. I'm not looking for sympathy or for anyone to try to talk my out of it, i'm just getting things off my chest to people who maybe in a similar situation as myself.

 

[Speedy]

Welcome to the forums, Derek! :welcome:

 

[Moat]

So why, if you have three kids and three grand children with another on the way, do you feel that every day is the same? If all you do is sit and dwell on things without at least trying to make the effort of changing things, then what is going to change in your life?
I've no idea how old your grand children are, but surely age doesn't matter - yours or them. Why won't you give them the chance to grow up knowing their pop, impart all yiu have learned in life on them and share in their smiles every day?

 

[derek]

So why, if you have three kids and three grand children with another on the way, do you feel that every day is the same? If all you do is sit and dwell on things without at least trying to make the effort of changing things, then what is going to change in your life?
I've no idea how old your grand children are, but surely age doesn't matter - yours or them. Why won't you give them the chance to grow up knowing their pop, impart all yiu have learned in life on them and share in their smiles every day?

I appreciate what you're saying but just because i have kids & grandkids doesn't mean my days are different. My kids are from a previous marriage & i only get to see them once in a while, after all, they have their own lives & families to look after, they don't need my doom & gloom.
Unfortunately i can't do anything until my daughter has given birth & probably won't do anything until after xmas.

 

[derek]

Welcome to the forums, Derek! :welcome:

Thanks

 

[IV2010]

Hi derek..my family don't bother about me and I understand how that feels.
I'm sorry you're feeling this way too.
the only thing that keeps me trudging forward is the pain I will cause them if I go..
sometimes that battle to stay seems too hard as well
Is there anything you would like to do in life that would make you feel better about living?
s*

 

[absolution]

Welcome to the forum, Derek! :hug:

I'm really sorry that you are feeling as though everyday is the same. That doesn't help us depressed people, I know. It sucks and makes it so much worse

I think it's great that you have three kids and three grandkids but not so great that you don't get to see them all so much. Do you think it would help you out and cheer you up to try and set up more time with them? Being around the people you love usually lifts the spirits Just a suggestion.

I hope you stick around! and if you ever need someone to talk to one on one feel free to PM me anytime xxx

 

[mytime]

Your life not being as bad as others dosen't mean you can't get depression and fell that its pointless and hopeless. I have heaps of good stuff and get deeply depressed. In fact, having no real reason for feeling so hopeless, and thinking about how others whose lives really suck manage so well, makes me feel a lot worse. But, sometimes, depression just happens. It dosen't mean nothing can help though.

 

[derek]

I'm a Scottish guy who has had enough of life.
I may not have the worst life comparing to others but i don't feel i can offer anyone anything more. I have 3 kids & 3 grandkids, with another one due in November, i know what people will say but to be honest my grandkids are too young to know me. I feel i'm just living the same day, every day, life is so mundane. I'm not looking for sympathy or for anyone to try to talk my out of it, i'm just getting things off my chest to people who maybe in a similar situation as myself.

My name is Stephen, Derek's brother & i'm sad to inform everyone Derek has passed away, he wrote down instructions for me re this site & others.