I got depressed last week over a huge misunderstanding that happened which wasn't my fault for a change but I took it the wrong way. I consumed 350 mls - half a bottle of port (fortified wine) each night over 4 nights. I don't have a drinking problem and usually never touch the stuff. I drank heavily because I'm not supposed to drink with the medication. I also had 2 sleeping pills 2 nights to make sure I slept thru the night. Another problem - not sleeping. Alcohol makes me think paranoid at work - not completely - just half and it affects my stomach. The docotor says I'm getting an ulcer. Most of the last week I planned another suicide attempt but when I opened my eyes I stop planning and just wish I had already done it. Last night I didn't drink and today I feel better except for the stomach problems. I wish it was easy to do the deed and stopping thinking around it.