Enough is Enough

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by spidy, Sep 12, 2009.

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  1. spidy

    spidy Well-Known Member

    Once again ive just zoned out plotting how i m going to end this miserable existence.I am sick of this illness in my head day after fricking day had a gut full of ending up in hospital doctors ppl telling things will get better.The medication sux i m paranoid anxious i freak out around ppl <Mod Edit, WildCherry: Methods>.I love my children but dont have anywhere to take them as im homeless,sick of the ex threatening me no access to them cause im suicidal.Had a gut full of failure.You took the only thng i worked hard for my family something tht meant heaps to me somethng i was finnally a part of since mum died.Everthng gunna be fine soon no more cold lonely nghts sleeping in my car no more head running at 100mph no more hurt all in all no more crap.Please Mum have your arms open when i arrive and pls forgive me for this wayout ive had enough of this misery.SORRY ALL FOR THIS DRIBBLE BUT NEEDED TO SAY SOMETHING> >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> This is the end,beautiful friend>This is the end,my only friend>The end of our elaborate plans>The end of everthng tht stands>THE END
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 12, 2009
  2. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    I know you're hurting right now, but please don't give up. I think you're a new member,s o please, stay here for a while and try to talk things out. If you're still alive, there's still hope that you can have a chance with your kids. But once you're gone, they lose a parent, and that's going to hurt them in a way that nothing else ever could.

    You can PM me anytime if you want to talk. I hope you change your mind and decide to hold on. You don't have to go through this alone.
     
  3. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    I am sorry to hear how much you are struggling. We all get tired of hearing that things will get bettr, butwho knows? Maybe they are right and they will. You never know if you don't stick around long enough to find out. :dunno: i am glad you have chosen to join us and post how you are feeling. I do need to caution you about posting methods. As we are a pro life forum, they are not allowed and as you can see were edited out. We will offer you as much support as we can. I hope you are able to find some reprieve from the pain. :hug:
     
  4. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    You have to be strong not only for you but for your kids Do not pass on this pain to them they won't understand and have to live with it the rest of their lives. Hospital stay the social worker will help you get housing to go to once your in hospital they can't discharge you to the streets get stable at hospital get strong so you are able to take care of your kids I am glad you came here as you can see we care we understand. Please stay here with us okay let all your pain out here so you can be strong later. take care
     
  5. spidy

    spidy Well-Known Member

    hospital not option i get out 2 3 days im bck had enough they treat ya like your a waste of bed space ya feel safe again get bck into the real world and anxiety and suicidle thgts set in again vicious circle and i cant find the wayout of this.The bloody lght at the end of the tunnel is a big mack truck coming at ya.I hate being like this i do but i m having more lows than hghs and i dont even know what ive done to deserve this sux thnk god hates me cause i hate me at moment
     
  6. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    You haven't done anything to deserve what you're going through. It's not your fault.
     
  7. spidy

    spidy Well-Known Member

    the ex will be bck here soon i m not feeling to good in myself still i think i ll park and sleep in hosp car park i m im shaking real bad and i m scared ive attempted 4 times and wont be long before i get it rght i hate days like this will come bck to site hopefully when i get acssess to putor mght try ring lifeline see if they can calm me down thnx all
     
  8. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    I hope you called Lifeline to get some help. That's a step in the right direction!
     
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