Even after so long ;; triggering?

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by AurionTobi, Apr 2, 2013.

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  1. AurionTobi

    AurionTobi New Member

    I still want to self harm.

    It's been at least half a year since I last self harmed, maybe longer but it's still there and it just doesn't go away. A bad day that leaves me curled up in my room and just crying and its there's and calling and tempting but I don't because I don't want to hurt the butterflies.

    I can do it, I tell myself, I can put down the razor and find something else but nothing, there is nothing that makes everything feel as better as cutting does, and that makes it feel like such an irrestiable temptation. Like, just cut and the pain will go away, just cut and feel something else, just do it, it'll make things better. Even though it won't, but it still feels like that and I can't stop myself.

    I'm on Paxil now and the depression is going away (is it? I can't tell if I'm just fooling mself) but the self harming urge is still there and I just can't deal with it. Even though I know theres other ways, I know it's dumb and stupid and I shouldn't I just can't stop from wanting it and feeling like I need it.

    How do I deal with this? Do the feelings ever go away?

    I'm just gonna shut up and stop ranting now.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hi AurionTobi yes hun the feeling do go away and you hun are doing so good to not self harm Do you have a therapist hun that can help you get rid of the urges the thoughs
    I am glad you are posting hun I hope you continue to do this it is another coping skill hun it help when you talk about things ok. You come here and talk you go outside for walk you keep busy ok hugs
  3. skinnylove911

    skinnylove911 Well-Known Member

    have you tried distraction/diversion techniques if that helps. I find going on this forum and others my distraction and also talking about off topic conversations helps.
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