All throughout my life I believed if you lead a life where you were nice and helpful, good things would happen. Yet I never do anything wrong, I try to help everyone just to be nice whether or not I will receive happiness myself. Yet in all my life, I can't think of once being happy. All I do day in and day out is help people, make others happy, and every day I can just feel my life would get worse. My life finally hit the point tonight where I wished I could do something destructive, with no fear of pain or death. The thing that stops me is the pain I would cause to my family and that's it. Anyone else just ever have their life turn out like this? Perhaps worse, maybe just similar?