Ever looked in the mirror...?

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by Deathly Strike, Oct 8, 2007.

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  1. Deathly Strike

    Deathly Strike Well-Known Member

    ...and thought to yourself how fucking ugly you look?

    I have. I do it everyday, and everyday I hate myself more and more. I look at the reflection and I just hate - non, loathe - everything about it. The hair, the face, the stomach, the arms, the legs. I just feel like I want to take a knife and slice it all off and start over again. I have a problem where, when I get really stressed or depressed, I literally tear my hair out. I have patches all over where the hair is really thin, or where there's no hair at all. And I have horrible eyes. There's nothing sexy or cute about them - they're ugly, like me. I just want to smash the mirror, smash my face and smash my life. I hate it.
  2. White Dove

    White Dove Well-Known Member

    its not the real you... the real you is on the inside.. your personality .. thats you.. your body is just to house you until you seperate from it to go home
  3. Allo..

    Allo.. Well-Known Member

    Dove is right.
    You aren't alone here, i know the feeling as i'm sure many others do.
    hun you are you, you could look worse and you have so much..
    keep looking inside yourself, that is what matters.
  4. Hache

    Hache Well-Known Member

    yes, from angles, the trick is you have to focus on what you like, and in time when ever you look at your reflection your eyes and mind will only focus there, i'm hideous from side on and dont even like it when people look at me that way. It gets me down but if you can get confidence how you look to everyone else wont matter too much.

    i dont have one of those though:mellow:
  5. Deathly Strike

    Deathly Strike Well-Known Member

    I hate it when people look at me fullstop.

    They're always trying to say I'm not fat, I'm not ugly or anything like that, but I just refuse to believe it. Fair enough, compared to what I looked like five years ago I've lost a lot of weight but it just gets me down because that just means I used to be really fat, and still am. I don't get how any of you can say I'm not ugly, and that personality is what counts, especially when you've never seen me and never will, because I'm too scared/shy/embarrassed to post a photo for you to see. Its also against forum rules, and I don't want to upset anyone with my brute ugliness, etc.
  6. special_needs

    special_needs Well-Known Member

    Yes, i have the same problem. In fact i try to avoid mirror as much as possible.
    so yea, dont really know how to help, but just wanted to say that you´re not alone!
  7. ih8u

    ih8u Active Member

    same problem along with some other problems. has become a laundry list.
  8. Deathly Strike

    Deathly Strike Well-Known Member

    I looked in the mirror again tonight, and now all I see is pure hatred. I look into those eyes and I just want to rip them out, and break that nose on that face staring back at me. I just want to STAB it and KILL it, and end it all. I hate it when I look at it, and all I see is this hideous thing looking back at me. It makes me want to gag, and cut and kill.

    I HATE IT!

    I hate it.

    I hate it.
  9. Blackness

    Blackness Guest

    and i hate ppl who call me cute.
    lies lies lies
  10. seishou

    seishou Guest

    I concur. I know I'm not much to look at. Still certain girls say I'm cute. Do they think I'm an idiot? :blink: Altho I guess I'm sort of the opposite from OP, as I consider myself WAY to thin. Now you might actually want to hurt me from saying that, but honestly... too thin is not pretty either. Oh and yeah, don't jump to conclusions.:tongue: I'm not anorexic. Nor do I have an eating disorder that I know of. Bleh, now I probably sound vain or something..
  11. jhayes0027

    jhayes0027 Well-Known Member

    Not at all, I think I'm too thin, actually hear about it quite often, and anymore it sickens me. I don't think it would be so bad but all my life I've always heard, you need to eat more, need to gain weight, etc.. blah blah blah. I eat more than most people I know and look like I am a toothpick or something. I'm not anorexic or anything either, just naturally thin.

    To the poster, I know the feeling, there are times when I see myself in my head and it's all ok, but then I see a mirror and hate myself for days on end. Nothing to do about it though but try and build up confidence or learn from the experiences.
  12. Deathly Strike

    Deathly Strike Well-Known Member

    I really, really feel like curling up and screaming my heart out.

    I did it once again this morning, and I just felt pure rage and resentment flowing through me. I hate looking at my reflection, and I hate how I look and yet I can't stop looking at myself. I guess it reminds me of how much of an ugly bastard I am, really. I deserve all this self-loathing, and hatred. I just want to smash the mirror, and my face and my life and everything to do with me. I'm not worthy of walking among the beautiful people of this world and those beautiful people are every other single human. I feel so inadequate compared to the rest of the world, like I'm not worthy. And I'm not, I agree. I should go, now, and end it all and give you much more room to breathe. I feel like cutting. No, more than that. I feel like dying.
  13. and.

    and. Guest

    I understand how you feel. Maybe not to the extent that you feel- maybe less, maybe more. I used to wear sunglasses all the time and check the mirror every 5 minutes or avoid looking at it at all. Some days I feel fine, other days I feel like resting all day in bed, not having to prep up to go outside. I know that no matter what people say it won't necessarily change the way that you feel; only you can change your perspective- not only about your appearance, but life in general. Also remember that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and that true beauty isn't just superficial appearances, no matter what the general population believes and what the media wants you to believe, and even what you believe. If everyone started saying that double chins are beautiful, and you were raised to believe that- then hey, we would all be wearing extra large. The truth of the matter is human beings can't be trusted to know and appreciate the true defintion of beauty, because we are merely finite creatures who have to be taught what is agreeable and disagreeable.

    The reason people want to acquire beauty is because everyone- and I mean everyone- wants recognition, acceptance, love and attention. It is a deep-seated, insatiable need that won't be filled by searching for it in the wrong places. You will never find peace if you continue directing all your focus on your wants and needs, no matter how great they seem. Once you change to way you think, and the way you perceive yourself and others around you, you'll begin to feel differently also. It's a long and hard process, but if you learn to overcome this disorder then you can learn to overcome countless other obstacles.
  14. savetoniqht

    savetoniqht Well-Known Member

    every second my life. it's disgusting.

    by the way, i don't know if you were just simplifying it for other people or if you were just saying that's what you do, that's called Trichotillomania. There's a very good chance you already know that, but just in case you didn't, it is a real disorder.
  15. Azul

    Azul Well-Known Member

    I know a lot of girls who are really pretty and think they're ugly. It's strange
  16. nunziosoprano

    nunziosoprano Member

    The only people that ever said I am not ugly is my family, but I know they don't really mean it and are just saying it to make me feel better and not hurt my feelings. I told them if I am not ugly than how come I am 24 and never had a girlfriend. Last time I checked people who are not ugly do not have a problem finding a girlfriend/boyfriend. They are usually at a lost for words after I say that because they know I am right. Even Leatherface from the "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" is alot better looking than me.
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