Every day i feel more on the fringes of other peoples and my own life

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Miss M, May 3, 2015.

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  1. Miss M

    Miss M New Member

    I buried my still born twin son 3 weeks ago. Never seen a white coffin before. That is when i began to detach myself from reality and the pain of loosing so much. I l already lost my brother 7 years ago> he was only 31. My 'partner' has absolutely no emotional intelligence. I am on my own with this one. Hence suicide seems more and more of a comfort than being constantly mis- understood and completely detached from life.
     
  2. GreySilence

    GreySilence Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry to hear about your losses, as well as your partner's lack of emotional sense. You might be misunderstood by those surrounding yourself, but just because they misunderstand you doesn't mean they don't care. Your partner can probably help you if you spill your heart out to them. If they cannot, then you can always look elsewhere for emotional support. You could try making some friends online, or in real life, or you could talk to a psychiatrist if that would put your mind at peace.

    As long as you are alive, there is a chance that you'll find a way to cope with or escape your problems one day. I'm sure there are things in this life that you enjoy as well, things that you may have forgotten due to them being hidden under all the depression. There are people that care about you too, and if you leave, then you'll be placing a heavy burden on them.

    If you stay alive, it's not guaranteed that you'll find happiness, but there is a chance. Gamble on that chance, keep on struggling and it might pay off one day. Stay strong!
     
  3. SDG

    SDG Member

    Hi

    You are so strong. Thank you for posting here. I cannot imagine what you must be going through with all of this, but I do know what it feels like to have your feelings misunderstood. I have even been on the opposite end of that, misunderstanding people's feelings and hurting them as a result. Your partner, I'm sure, would be supportive if s/he knew how to be. It is hard for someone like you who has gone through so much to find someone who can share or empathize with your feelings.

    This world is a tough place to be, I absolutely understand that. And we're all twisted up beyond recognition. Existence seems totally pointless after all this loss. But don't let the world pull you down. You are already far stronger than most people ever have the opportunity to be. And that is incredible. But don't give up now. Fight it. Fight it with all you've got, because you're more important than you know. Reading this very post has changed even my life a tiny bit.

    You're loved.
     
  4. NYJmpMaster

    NYJmpMaster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    You have the strength to continue inside you, it just needs time to surface. Three weeks is not enough time to grieve for that type of loss so don't be in a hurry to put it behind you or try to bury it inside instead of letting it out. Soon there will be an occasional minute or few minutes when it does not hurt so much and then those moments will turn into hours and hours then into an afternoon or evening. At some point will be days and weeks even where things are better and it does not hurt. There will also be times that hurt and bad days for the rest of your life, but it is perfectly okay as that is what love is and that is why it is worth it to be here and alive to experience and find others to love as well.
     
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