every day

every day i go to bed wishing that i will not wake up in the morning, hopeing that maybe something will happen in my sleep, and every day i wake up dissapointed. even after trying to od several times, i pass out wishing that this will be it, but i keep waking up and with no adverse side effects. other people have died taking less, but it seems that unfortunately my body does not want to go. every day is a dissapointment, maybe tonight will be different but i doubt that it will be. does anyone else feel the same?

 

welcome.

i will say i have felt this way in the past, although not today. i'm sure you know but every time you o/d it is possible for you to damage your organs, esp. your liver. please be careful.

could it be that what you really want is for the pain to stop, and not to actually die? that could be why you are still here, despite your attempts. if that is the case, please know that you *can* recover from feeling suicidal and overwhelming depression.

what do you think has brought you to this point?

 

welcome to the forum seeing that its your first post here,
i'm pretty certain that most of the people here have wished the same thing that you wish, sleep over and not to wake up again what a peaceful way to go.. i told myself the same thing before i went to bed.
since i'm still here typing, means those wishes just isn't working as it is.. screw it!
all i can say is that, just go day by day living each day, the day will come whether its getting better or worse :dry:

 

I often wished the same thing as you. I can imagine how big disappointment to wake up in the morning.. ppl who succeeded in O/D are really lucky, I think.

I feel like I'm caught up from an evil or being cursed to have life like a hell...

 

I wish that every night when I go to sleep, and I woke up every morning dissapointed. I havent tried to OD or something. One day i will, I hope Ill succeed. I havent tried because Im afraid of failure, but then everyone will know that Im suicidal, so probably my life will be worse than now, althought I feel like Im already in hell. Untill the day Ill try to do it, I hope that something will happen, something that can give me an easy way to go, to die without doing anything, to die naturally, or suddenly, i dont know, just to die without killing myself.

 

Welcome!!!

The first step after accepting that you are suicidal is to ask for help. Sometimes this is the hardest part.

Your body is telling you that it's not your time to go.

I'm glad that you are still here with us.