I am an addict and I am currently trying to reform myself and will be admitted to Rehab within the next few weeks, before Xmas I have been told. I have sever mental health issues too, I am anorexic because I wanted my family to notice me cause I didnt live with them but really wanted back with them, so finally i had to admit the truth that I was an addict looking to get help on the road to recovery and have now made myself medically anorexic and have very bad problems even feeling hungry and if I do I feel guilty eating. I have very bad anxiety and self-confidence issues which is a totally different person to them person I used to be 3n a 1/2 years ago, I worked in Property and lived in a posh part of glasgow, driving my Range Rover. Now I am back at my mothers & step Dads who has never wanted me their. We did get along for a little while their when I moved in around 3 months ago buy not now everythings has went terrible as I have relapsed so I have lied about where I have been going sometimes and my Step Dad, who would try find fault in anything I do to get me out has been following me and the one night I was going to my meeting I ended up not going cause my friend who was coming with me asked me to pick her up and I went in and we ended up having a cuppa and watching Easties and then we were too late, totally unintentional. However my stepdad followed my, never told my mother that he had caught me until I got in and waited for me lying to my mother then told her when I went to bed what he had done. So I have now not been in the house since Thursday I have an 8 year old sister who will be missing me like mad and I miss her so much and they know I miss her as I txt my mother to ask if i could phone my wee sister and got told no she wont be in then I got fobbed off again. They are using her as a pawn to stick the knife into me more and more and I have committed suicide when I was 16 but my mother just caught me in the nick of time as my system had shit down so I know I can do it and have thought of ways to do it so that my younger sister can get told it was an accident, no pills or anything like that involved. I really cant stop thinking about doing it I cant get the feelings of worthesness away and how much of a failure i am to my family who are all successful and so anti drugs but are always their for me and im sick of them always having to be their for me im 28 im a looser and I dont know if I have the will power to carry on for another few weeks living where I am I need back to my mums but they will both argue with me when i see them or my mum will just tell me to leave. Oh my god I hate my existance!!!!