Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Rachael41, Jun 14, 2008.

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  1. Rachael41

    Rachael41 Well-Known Member

    I cant do this anymore. i really have no purpose. I have tried so hard and that actually kills me. I have no one to turn to. My mums dyin, my dad hates me, and my sister is off with her husband. Whats the point no1 cares. I have given up so many times, but yet im 2 afraid to through with it.
    Thats whats called WEAK. 2 me, decidin to take your own life, is something strong. to be able to make such a decision and know u can never take it back once its done, is a characteristic i view courageous in people. God i wish i had that strength.

    I tried so bad....i even thought about telling people, but the one person who i trust and love, jst betrayed me.
    How does it feel knowin you killed me?
    How does it feel knowiin you were my last hope, and i chose to die, because of what you did?
    I hate this whole world and everythiing about it.
    Im worthless i deserve to die. i should. How can this life b worth living?
    wat i really need is someone to hold me and "promise" that it will all b ok?

    but really no one can do that.

    iv cut myself so many times. its the only thing htat helps me feel better. asthough i need 2 cut myself and see the blood pour out in order to feel.
    i no i deserve that pain, thats why i inflict it,...to give meanin 2 my worthless life. Sometimes i find it amusing to know im such a good liar. smiling away whilst inside, my heart is achin and all i want to do is shrivel up and die.

    im sorry but it has to end......soon !
  2. Epical Taylz

    Epical Taylz Well-Known Member

    i feel the same way
    i was also fucked up by someone who i loved and trusted with everything
    ever sense we ended our relationship,
    people have died, and i have cut

    things will get better though
    i have faith that they will
    ill be praying for you Rachael.

    i have some questions, but if youre not ready to
    be asked then i wont.
    if you are ready, then feel free to PM [private message]
    me :] im always on :]]
  3. Pensive

    Pensive Well-Known Member

    I can't give you any answers, I don't even know why I'm still here myself to be honest. But most of what you describe is what I feel too.
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