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Everything's shit...like anyone will care.

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Hazibell, Jan 31, 2009.

  1. Hazibell

    Hazibell Well-Known Member

    .I am so insecure about everything and the person thats meant to 'love' me has told me its 'fucking stupid'.
    .I am terrified of dying and the people around me dying.
    .I am arguing with my real mother which I hardly ever do. But recently its been bad. Then I feel bad after.
    .Two people love me. One prolly for sex, the other, is like I said on the first one, is just nasty.
    .The person I want to love me doesn't.
    .My job, I like, but people talk about me, and I think I'll prolly be leaving on the 3 month review.
    .My car is shitty and I'm too scared to use it tbh. Trying to sell it and hopefully get another one.
    .The people I love and are practically my family, have their own things going on and I don't wanna make things more difficult by loading them with my problems.
    .I feel like utter shit.
    .I work in the warehouse sometimes and today proper got my arms cut, and wanting it to do it more sooo much.
    .Cry all the freaking time then go hyper happy others.
    .Keep getting invited out with people and I really don't wanna go.

    Things are just SHIT.
    If it wasn't for my acting and drama and loving the group I do it with in this area, I would leave. Take my car and drive. France or something. Idkk. Just how I feel now and again.
    Considering becoming a magician and just....disappearing....:rolleyes:
  2. kenny

    kenny Well-Known Member

    Hi Hazibell

    I can identify with a lot of what you've written - insecurity is at the root of my problems too. I don't know what to suggest, but the fact that you do have something you enjoy in your drama group is a positive thing, I think.

    I'm too exhausted to think properly right now but I wanted to post something, since your thread had no replies.

    if you wanna talk, I'm happy to listen.

    take care
  3. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    :hug: I'm here if you need to talk xx