I've been up since 4am, had a slight increase in a medication two nights ago that was suppose to help with my sleeping and anxiety, no effect whatsoever, except maybe more vivid nightmares. My mind races all day long and all night, sometimes I can't even catch a train of thought and pin it down. want so much to stop everything, can't stop being so fidgety and having all this going on in my head. Can't hold conversation well at least in real life, typing seems a little easier. Right now I want to SH, can't say method but already failed and did it twice this week. So angry with myself about it then, now it doesn't matter. Just need to, might be the only way to slow things down. Only way to prevent a suicide that seems so impeding. Please Help I don't want to go back to my SH that was so addictive. I had stopped all that, been free from it for years.