extreme emotions in a short time frame

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by MoAnamCara, Mar 24, 2012.

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  1. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    Things seem odd today. Started out ok. The last hour or two I've begun to sink. I can't put a reason or words to how im feeling. Anxiety is cranking up, other thoughts are entering again. I can't keep any busier than what I have, I don't want this on/off pressure cooker thing going on. Am not sure what to do. :(
     
  2. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    And I suppose no one else does either..... :(

    You see this affirms my negative personal opinion. Ho hum.
     
  3. 1Lefty

    1Lefty Well-Known Member

    Mo - all I can offer is my experience, which was mood swings like a kaleidoscope. There was no predicting or preparing for them. I'm sorry. Your psyche is probably trying to process one of the most intense losses there is. If you have someone there, that alone can be calming. Don't be afraid to ask, even trivial- a cupof tea at a certain temp. Jello. Whatever, this is your time to allow others to help you. Didn't mean to write so long, but your wild mood swings are something I also experienced. Proper medicatio may help take the edge of, but nothing I tried would completely reset me. It's pure hell and I'm sorry
     
  4. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    Thank you 1lefty and :hug:'s for you.

    I feel tonight as if I'm on the edge of something. Something dangerous. Something ominous. Something unknown. Something intangible. Something scary.

    I want to scream HELP, but no one is there to listen. And I won't scream because I'm too private to let anyone irl know how I really am. Not that it'd really matter anyhow, the one who would listen gets paid to do so and I'd land myself in hospital.
     
  5. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    Ah Mo...that damn emotional roller coaster of grief!
    All you're feeling is ''normal'' in this, the worst of pain, the loss of your loved one.
    I used to drive to an isolated place and scream my head off in my car (still do) ..it helped!
    :console:
     
  6. windlepoons

    windlepoons Well-Known Member

    Mo I am sorry I was not there last night.
    I think the screaming idea is a good one, it seems to help.
     
  7. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    It is so difficult to have to do things that are so far out of your 'comfort zone' (odd word choice. I know because nothing is comfortable), but maybe testing the waters and opening up about somethings may be helpful...much caring and here if you need me
     
  8. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    Hoping for help tonight. No idea from where. No idea what type of help. No idea of pretty much anything. Wanting to si, trying to prevent going there. I feel empty.
     
  9. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    Ok, get me out of here please. please. please.

    kindly put me on leave.
     
  10. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    :cry: ready to hurt something/ myself

    Think I've messed too much up, esp those trying to help.

    Such is my pattern
     
  11. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    hope you are ok Mo?
    Is there someone you can call to be with you?
    :console:
     
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