I just feel like what's the point in even trying to be happy? I'm never truly going to be happy. Everything I do turns to shit in my hands. I look for advice, I get slapped in the face. I find a solution. I hit a fucking wall. I don't wanna kill myself anymore because what's the point? That won't make me happy. I don't wanna harm myself because that's just gonna hurt more, fuck that. I guess I'll be a scrooge my whole life. I'll just be a cynical, bitter, cold, arrogant fuck who's never happy. That's my lot in life and my destiny. I accept it now.