Life is pointless but that doesnt mean it must remain pointless, you can put the point into life. Without getting too philosophical, we exist (lets just take that as fact) but how we exist is completely subjective. Fair enough their are imposed restrictions on this, council tax, money for nessecities etc etc.
You say you have to do this job, and you have to do it for the next 40 years, your actively deciding that, you dont have to. Maybe for now you do, but if along side it you are working on a change, then havent you given life a point. Not choosing to change anything, is the same as choosing to keep everything the same.
You said love doesnt exist. Well it does and it doesnt. Once again its purely subjective. Love is different to everyone. I agree the portrayal of love is never the same as the real thing, but it doesnt deny its existence, it only means you havent recognised it, in the form you've imagined it. I know love, and i've felt love. But i dont believe in 'true love', because my 'true love' with be in the shape of perfection, this doesnt exist, im aware of that, so for me 'true love' doesnt exist.
I'm guilty of this just as much as you, posting on this site and finishing the post with 'I dont care', I know that admitting you care is harder than facing the problems itself, but its the first step. I hope my post will atleast make you think twice, I understand death seems so attractive, but if we really didnt want to live we both wouldnt be on this site. If you ever wanna talk let me know!
Kp. x