Facing a dilemma of being alone again leading into 2012. Want out!

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by thebaronspell, Dec 29, 2011.

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  1. thebaronspell

    thebaronspell Well-Known Member

    I'm well and truly cursed! Since I last posted on here I've been in a relationship which like all the others ended prematurely for reasons I can't really pin my finger on and may I say not entirely my fault? I'm just being my sweet and gentlemanly self its mind boggling why women keep changing from being kind into monsters on me. I can only guess they've decided to lash out on me because they suspect I won't be responding any time soon and stand up for myself.

    Not saying their isn't any nice women around because I went for lunch with one after I unfairly got dumped but I'm sick and tired of dating yet I get heckled with abuse for being single and even my sexuality gets questioned which makes being alone very daunting when I'm quite happy to have no contact with anybody at times.

    I just can't face another New Years eve stuck indoors keeping my Mum company when the whole evening is basically unspoken off and just like any other yet I don't want to go out for fear of feeling like I've deserted my Mum and making her home alone. To be honest I'm supposed to be out for the first time on this occasional event with mates but it'll be at a place where single people will stick out like a sore thumb. I can't face what next year will bring and have been feeling very suicidal about it to be honest as I've had enough. I can't live in a World like this anymore its cruel. I might not feel depressed lately but I am depressed??
  2. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    Well, I do not know when the last time you posted was, but I can say at least you have been in a relationship recently. Has been... Hmm coming up on three years now for me. Did I mention I only had the one girl who was so desperate to be in a relationship that the mere mention of it would get her in bed? Anyway, just a thought I had about that.

    As far as thus event you are supposed to go to. I hate to break it to you but single people stand out more no matter what. I guess you could say it is our curse. I have to work extra hard to be ambient at company functions and even anime conventions. So you are not alone in that aspect. Your best option is to stand in a not too obvious place. You can also pretend to be above relationships. I normally just say that I am more evolved, enlightened, intelligent or something like that than normal people. I do not attach hormone driven reproduction to a word in a pathetic attempt to mask my shame about being sexually active. That will blow most people's minds and make them leave you alone. You can also take a misogynist attitude and when confronted talk about how watching paint dry is far more interesting than any woman. Mypoint is you need to have a story. Even if it is 100% BS

    As for your mom. I say who cares? You do not sound to attached to her. It is not your problem she is alone. It is certainly not your responsibility to keep her company. Whenever my mom gives me attitude about not wanting to spend time around her. I calmly reminded her she choose to ruin her social life and not have an abortion.

    Can I ask what steps have you taken to fix you being alone? You have to be the master of your own destiny and make changes. Otherwise, nothing will change.
  3. IntoTheWoods

    IntoTheWoods Guest

    My marriage ended 3 yeara ago - it was a total shock. I couldn't envisage myself being on my own and joined some dating sites. I met some nice people but realised that no relationship was better than a bad one. So for now have resigned myself to being single.

    It has been hard - I used to like to party, get drunk, be wild - that was who I was, so to now be in the house, drinking a cup of tea on my own is a little odd for me to get used to.

    So now I am trying to just focus on sorting myself out. I bought a puppy and have met so many people (and dogs) just walking her everday - it is always a challenge because I find it hard to talk to people unless I have had a few drinks, but I force myself to and know at the very least the exercise is good for my brain even on the days that we don't see anyone else.

    I know not everyone likes pets, but for me she has been the very best thing I could have done for myself.

    New Years Eve lasts for a few hours, it is a reminder of how lonely life can be and what we would wish for - but maybe to find contentment we need to find a way of doing life differently - to try things out, to make mistakes maybe, but not to give up.
  4. 1Lefty

    1Lefty Well-Known Member

    I really, really understand what the first 2 posters are saying. I could have written it myself - for about 20 years. I was well into my 30's when I met THE one, and there was a "click" connection that I had never had with any woman before. Just being with her redeemed every lonely night I'd spent.

    I guess I'm just saying it's too early to give up.

    I wish you peace,
  5. thebaronspell

    thebaronspell Well-Known Member

    Basically I can't work out why I keep falling for girls who change on me for no apparent reason. They appear to be innocently adorable and then I see horrible things from them. I'm not being naïve I'm genuinely being myself and sweet hearted I don't think that's a crime. They probably think its too good to be true and hurt me before they get 'heart broken first" which doesn't happen. I've been broken lots it gets more painful.

    I'm sorry but I really couldn't stand to wait decades, not in this tory lead Britain. Life is depressing enough :(
    I'd prefer to talk about it via PM I'd be more comfortable explaining my troubles x
  6. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    I say if you do not want to wait decades then don't. Go out there and try to meet new women. There are plenty of books and forums dedicated to helping men get better with women.

    I am always up for a PM conversation if you life.
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