I am so on overload... The trial date is this Friday and I don't know how I can face the author of so much of my pain - yet I have to I am fighting so hard to protect myself and especially my young children. I moved through life disconnected because there was no other way to survive...He was a horrible, cruel, controlling man...Physically, emotionally, sexually abusive... He has been gone 3 years and is still fighting to get 50% custody of the youngest 3 children.... I am running out of money... My oldest 4 will testify of his abuses and against him in court - they are stronger than I am - I will also testify, please G-d, I will have the strength I am terrified... but I can't give in!