It's terrific how every day hurts. Deep inside the pain kills me. Why do you make me sound selfish? You tell me that people love me and that I would make them sad If I left forever. I am not selfish! It's not my fault that you care, It's not my fault that you will be sad. Don't try to lie to me. Because I don't care if you blame me. I know I am pathetic and I understand my worthless life. I don't want to be alone and yet I hate being with people. I hate being seen. I hate being touched. I hate being spoken to. A person who hates everything and despises this polluted world shouldn't be forced to live. There are so many people in this world that can do better then I could ever do. I don't want to live in this chaos with these feelings of hate, jelousy, and greed. I am sick of being ill and I am destroyed by poisonous surroundings. Humans are terrible creatures.... worse then monsters who haunt nightmares. I don't want to live anymore. I don't want to exist purely because I was born. Life shouldn't be pushed on anyone who truly doesn't want to live. I do understand that life is a wonderful gift.... but It is a gift I should of never been given. I am sick of breathing.... coughing on toxic air. My world decays and eventually it will disappear. My time is short and I enjoy the promises of death. I wish to return to the earth. I don't care for false hopes of paradise. I don't care for threatening lies of eternal damnation. All I want is peace. All I want is nothingness. Darkness can take me away. I no longer want to play with the devils who prey in light.