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  1. failing_myself

    failing_myself New Member

    I've read a lot of posts on this website and it really helped me put my problem in perspective... and I really have to say that my problem doesn't sound as bad as most of the problems the other people have... but in my world and in my case it has made me think of death really often.

    I know I could never kill myself. The pain that my family would feel would be too much to handle and I couldn't leave my little sister.

    I live in a family of very smart people. My sister is very intelligent and also my parents are very smart. I am the older of two daughters and so it was clear that the pressure was always on me... I had nobody to help me or tell me what to do like my sister. I am the dumb one.

    This past week I had my final exams... and I failed. :( I feel horrible. I cried every night since then, my eyes are all read and swolen. I read a lot of stories and I haven't found something like in my case. This makes me think that normal people wouldn't kill themselve over such a stupid thing, but I feel this constant pressure of my parents and friends and I FAILED... even writing this it hurts so bad. And all my friends passed with great grades... I feel so dumb. I let down my family and myself. The suicide thoughts have been surrounding my head every day since... I already had this problem a few years ago... but I didn't think it would return, but it did.

    Now as I said, failing a final exam may sound stupid to you people, but for me and my life it was so important to pass and I failed, I feel like I screwed up my whole life. You should have seen the look my "friends" gave me. The pitty in their eyes killed me inside. And I can't stand them feeling bad for me: Poor little girl failed the final exam... I don't know what to do... I hate them all. I hate the way they treat me and the way they look at me...

    I'm just so sad at the moment... :'(
  2. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    Re-sit. Everyone has failures in life, doesn't mean they are thick or can be a whole myriad of reasons why you failed.
    When I was at school I was told "hell will freeze over before you pass chemistry"
    same with maths:sad:
    Ten years later I took A levels in maths, chemistry, physics and biology...aced the lot of them (my score in chemistry was 99%) I guess the devil is feeling mighty cold:laugh:

    Take a break, then have a look at why you think you failed..prepare and's a slip up not a disaster :hug:
  3. rd9671

    rd9671 Guest

    Let me ask you a question....if your sister or friend failed an exam as you did, how would you feel toward that person? It probably wouldn't change your opinion of how that person is, just give you a new perspective of how they are affected by the world. We tend to be more critical of ourselves than we ever would be of others (this is what gets me in troulbe anyway). I would recommend taking a step back from the situation and analyse how you would react to someone else in the same situation and try to show yourself the same compassion.
    And please don't get down on yourself for feeling the way that you do. This is your problem and it is seriously affecting you, therefore, it is a serious problem and should not be treated lightly. I know that this is the final exams and all, but is there a way to retest or take extra courses? I would also try to understand why you failed the test. Are you having difficulty with the subject matter, or is test taking a source? I know I was never very good at taking tests, but I knew the subject matter. Maybe there is someone who can help you in that area.
    Well, I hope this helps, and please don't be so hard on yourself. Take care.
  4. skater

    skater New Member

    Actually i went through the exact same thing,about a year and a half ago i was going through the possibility of failing exams and been an "ordinary" person in life and been looked down upon by friends and family,but lucky for me i actully passed my exams,but i can tell you if i didn't pass i would not be here today,the pressure is just to much.

    I just hope you can get through this and try and do better next time round,maybe there is still a chance to pick up the pieces,if not then....
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