Discussion in 'After Effects' started by BornFree, Aug 15, 2012.

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  1. BornFree

    BornFree Well-Known Member

    Really scared last attempt 18months ago was really serious and almost didnt make it & as a result I know I would not fail the next time. Now means are here again and physically shaking. Trying to fake being fine to the family . Not being in a good place does not help I cant believe I am so triggered by means... or seeing it... I just dont want to be in pain anymore I want to be free...
  2. lovehatething

    lovehatething Member

    I wasn't going to make it the second time, my roommate found me and I survived. I know how you feel and I'm not just saying that. It breaks my heart reading what you wrote because I felt it too. Please please don't give up, it gets better I promise. I was nineteen when I attempted twice and I thought it never would but it did.
  3. WildCherry

    WildCherry ADMIN

    :hug: Here if you want to talk.
  4. Kiba

    Kiba Well-Known Member

    :hug: :(
  5. BornFree

    BornFree Well-Known Member

    Oh God I cant do this I cant I want to slice to cut to take anything & everything... I cant care so much & let people in... Oh God!! So freaking out right now - h at work & kids in bed... it would be so easy... ring for ambulance for kids so they arent left on their own & leave...
  6. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    And you did not text, call, PM me or anything? What am I chopped liver? Ditsy, you have friends here; people who really care..please talk to us...what do you have to lose? I know I am a highly imperfect person, and lack wisdom most of the time, but I am a good listener, and I usually can find something to 'normalize' a situation...please just try...if I fail, you can strike it up to my inadequacies...and who else can have a real roller derby contest with you???? Connect in any way that is most comfortable for me or anyone else you chose

    Here is how I would express it, Ce Ce Winans & Whitney from Waiting to Exhale
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