Failure, depressed, lonely

I've been pretty much alone for the past 5 years, with only occasional contact from friends from high school....basically I have no one. I've never had a girlfriend and don't suppose I ever will. I'm also so constantly depressed that I can barely do anything: many days I can't even eat or watch TV...

As far as my life goes, I'm a three time college dropout, I'm unable to hold a job which means I have to live with my mom and just sit in the house all day thinking about what it would feel like to be normal, to just be a part of society. I don't have a car so I can almost never get away from the house...

The point of all this I guess is that I'm basically a failure at life with no hope of becoming a normal person. So I guess I just think of suicide as the most rational way out. Why should I sit here and suffer day in and day out just for the hope that someday someone will come along and work some magic to solve the problems I've been suffering from for half a decade. I don't know.

 

I've been thinking about the same thing as well. I'm in college right now, second year but haven't made a single friend, all I do is just eat, sleep, study and go to class, I commute. Haven't had friends for many years and don't think I will ever have a girlfriend. I feel like I have to commit suicide too, I am a total failure in this society, I wish I could be normal too but its too late to change....

Doesn't help you, but just though that there's another guy that can totally sympathize with you.

 

Hello!

You´re in pain. I know what you feel... i think that so many times.

Luckily not today.:smile:

Can i give an advice? First of all you need to find a job (Which is also what i need to do).
With a job, you´ll have your income... and you´ll be able to buy the car or whatever you want.
For me it will be harder to find the job that i need so much... i have social anxiety and panic attacks. Talking to people is something i avoid...

Do you see my problem?

Take care,
Maria

 

Yeah...The root of all my problems is that I have severe social anxiety and avoidant personality disorder...Getting a job is almost impossible for me...keeping on is impossible.

 

How long have you had it?
I'm about to get a job soon, I'm not sure if I have social anxiety disorder or whatnot.
I'm pretty sure I'd have no problem keeping a job.

Its just that I don't think I can ever make friends, get a girlfriend, get married, etc. I'm just too inferior, too boring, nothing much about me. :sad:

 

nkrukato "I'm not sure if I have social anxiety disorder or whatnot"

Probably because you don´t. You would know. Believe me.

F-bomb you can´t give up. But you have to look for a job... the only thing to do is to try...

Today i made a decision. If i can´t find the job i´m looking for until january i´ll apply for any job.... temporary.. whatever...

All the best,
Maria

 

F-Bomb you sound just like me. I am social phobic, avoidant, agoraphobic. I am feeling numb at the moment and yes have had suicidal thoughts but I feel that if I can just hang in there and somehow pluck up the motivation I can get out of this situation and lead a relatively normal life. I think you can too.