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Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by AmericanNight, Aug 18, 2009.

  1. AmericanNight

    AmericanNight Member

    Since I can remember I have always failed at everything I have set out to do, I failed in school, did not graduate with my classmates, was keep back a few times, I even had a career counselor tell me I would be nothing more than a laborer when I was in High School. I joined the Military but I never made the higher ranks, I retired a lower ranked person, people that I thought would never make rank in the Military passed me and went on to successful careers. I never got into trouble for 20 years in the Navy received many awards but never the rank to go with them. I have tried to do good for my wife and kids but everything I do, collapses, I am even trying to make a run at an online business and in four months I have had 4 sales, looks like failure again. All I want is for my wife and kids to be in a decent neighborhood not the crime infested place we are in now. Everyday constant constant worry, I throw up in the morning, I am dazed all day and I am stressed beyond belief. My Psychiatrist has heard this story and she and others say I have AADD and probably had it all my life and was never diagnosed with it, along with the other mental problems I have. I feel like someone or something has played a cruel joke on me by marking me for failure along with those who are close to me. I just want to cry and never stop.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hey if you made it in the navy you are not a failure no matter what rank. The navy doesn't take failures. I think you did the best that you could and there is nothing wrong with being a general labour either You should be proud of your accomplishments i know i am proud of you take care you are not a failure not in my eyes anyway.
  3. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    You're not a failure. You joined the military, and you made it. You survived, and that in itself shows you aren't a failure.

    What kind of online business are you running? Have you been able to do much advertising?
  4. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Your not a failure as long as you keep trying.. You only fail if you give up..I'm uneducated also..Did the general labor thing for years..The only two times in my life I was proud of was when I joined the Marines and when I got a job as a dispatcher, it was management so I made good money.. I ended up loosing everythingbecause of my depression..Now I am an isolationist but I don't see myself as a failure.. That was just an example for you..Keep trying you will be surprised how good things sneak in when you aren't expecting them..
  5. AmericanNight

    AmericanNight Member

    I understand what all of you are saying, but because I was able to tough out the Navy for 20+ years does not make me successful, in fact it has done the opposite, everything i was promised by the Military when I retired is going away, benefits that were supposed to be for me and my family are not being honored.

    I thought being in the service would train you for a good job when you get out, but that was a lie, employers do not care, in fact a lot of them do not want to hire veterans because they don't want to pay them for what their worth.

    Now that I am unemployable anyway it doesn't matter, I can't go forward, there is no goal, I can't support my family on what I make. CRAP!!!!

    I can't deal with this, my head feels like it wants to explode, I have pressure in front of my head the sides and my eyes are beginning to hurt. I don't know, my family doesn't know half the stuff I feel, I have just shut myself out to anyone now. I just want to quit.