Was took to hospital last wednesday after a attempt, was found,
got seen by psych team who told me they would be getting the home treatment team out to me, 5 days later, and nothing!! not a word from anyone, left to fester with my mind telling me to just get it over with and join my sister.
I live in a homeless hostel, so its not like anyone is going to notice anyway when I am gone! my psychologist is the only person who even pretends to give a shit!!!! :'(
I can not do this anymore, I am losing who I really am, I don't even know who I am anymore, have completely lost the person i used to be, all be it i have been ill ten years now but i used to atleast to be even dream that things may change may get better but now I cant even do that, my sleep is ruined with dreams of different ways in which i can take my life, my mind consumed every waking moment!! :''(
I went to the shops today and collected all I will need, took me 8 shops to get it all, but I am done, I am not me, I just need to be with my sister and if the hospital wont help me or anyone else than I have no other choice anymore I can not control myself from my mind anymore, I can not stop myself doing what it tells me to!
I just wanted to be accepted, helped, cared for by people who are meant to care, instead they raped, beat up, drugged, left me homeless, alone......
I was raped again, ten years of it happening all the time, i feel like a toy and I can not be their toy anymore, I can not anymore, I am done, finished, kim I am coming with you.
I hope you all achieve your dreams! xxxxxxxxxx
got seen by psych team who told me they would be getting the home treatment team out to me, 5 days later, and nothing!! not a word from anyone, left to fester with my mind telling me to just get it over with and join my sister.
I live in a homeless hostel, so its not like anyone is going to notice anyway when I am gone! my psychologist is the only person who even pretends to give a shit!!!! :'(
I can not do this anymore, I am losing who I really am, I don't even know who I am anymore, have completely lost the person i used to be, all be it i have been ill ten years now but i used to atleast to be even dream that things may change may get better but now I cant even do that, my sleep is ruined with dreams of different ways in which i can take my life, my mind consumed every waking moment!! :''(
I went to the shops today and collected all I will need, took me 8 shops to get it all, but I am done, I am not me, I just need to be with my sister and if the hospital wont help me or anyone else than I have no other choice anymore I can not control myself from my mind anymore, I can not stop myself doing what it tells me to!
I just wanted to be accepted, helped, cared for by people who are meant to care, instead they raped, beat up, drugged, left me homeless, alone......
I was raped again, ten years of it happening all the time, i feel like a toy and I can not be their toy anymore, I can not anymore, I am done, finished, kim I am coming with you.
I hope you all achieve your dreams! xxxxxxxxxx