Fantasy Lives???

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by Megz, Jun 10, 2011.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. Megz

    Megz Active Member

    Does anyone else have a little life that they live in their head? Not just fantasies like most people have, but a whole other reality? Not delusions and not 'dreams' or wishes but maybe somewhere between the 2?

    I do, I have developed it over a few years. When things are OK I don't rely on it so much but I know things are starting again when I retreat there more often. I know things are really bad when I want to constantly be on my own so that I can go back to my little world and all the pain of this one goes away. I will lie in bed for hours and totally avoid contact with other people to make sure I can do it. It even carries on day to day and things that I do in my life or events that happen also 'happen' in my fantasy world, just for different reasons and with different outcomes.

    I'm not delusional - I know the difference between my fantasy self and life and the real one - all too well, I just choose to retreat into my 'other life'. But sometimes it does seem like the line may be blurring - I still know the difference but well, say I'm at work, instead of thinking about coming home to 3 days worth of washing up and a cold empty house, I will trip into my other life and think about the lovely warm house with my lovely husband and maybe a baby or 2 waiting for me. I never tell anyone about this world - this is the first time that I've admitted to it. The people in my life know how my life is and I don't ever substitute details from my fantasy life with my real life - it just wouldn't be possible to sustain it.

    In my world I have a boyfriend/husband and this is because It's been sadly lacking in my real life - the person varies but they are never a 'real' person - usually a film, tv or book character.

    I don't know maybe I AM as mad as I sound......... I'd love some feedback on this it's not something I've ever discussed before.

  2. Avarice

    Avarice Well-Known Member

    I do something similar, but it's not quite the same as you. I make up characters in my head and play out their lives for them in thought. Usually starts with a woman, single, finds a guy or sleeps with a guy and gets pregnant, gets with him or hates him and finds someone else, custody issues.. has another baby when she sleeps with him again.. etc., etc., it varies all the time, sometimes more fantasy like, sometimes more drama filled. I go into this world and think out their lives and the ways that they talk and look (usually like you, a film or TV character though sometimes not) all the time, usually for hours.

    It's not exactly the same as what you said, but it helps me waste the time and keep me sane, even. I don't think you're mad.. as long as you don't cross the line between reality and fantasy there's no real harm in it as far as I can see.
  3. Benjamin O.

    Benjamin O. New Member

    Dear Megz:

    No, there is no delusion here.

    It would sound as though you've stumbled down the rabbit hole and come upon your own unique and inventive faculty. Although you spoke against a dream; observation and intuition suggests that what you have come across is a rather sweet, albeit very potent daydream. May I ask: had you ever fully-considered the option of bringing that world of yours into ours? Not literally, no; but literarily. Many great writer's were known to form abysmal lands and fragrant characters in their heads long before they'd put their worlds to pen. It's a common practice, though, often, rather secret to each writer. I do hope you consider the option thoroughly.

    In effect, I ask only that you do not get lost in the clouds. As wondrous as it may be, a retreat is still a retreat. You must be mindful not to let it become your obsession. After all, you are ultimately here in this world. Which can be a good thing, too; even at a bad time. You are a very special person, as is your world. Though, there is much left untrodden by you in this one. I hope that you will not forget that. Be well, dear.


    Benjamin O.
  4. morning rush

    morning rush Well-Known Member

    I used to do that all the time, I would focus on a film or tv series I love make up my own character and kind of enter the series or continue on the film....that's how I was able to write stories...lately I've lost that ability...I can think of it but can't write about it...not sure why...

    often the stories I depict in my mind are far way better than the real one I'm living...I so wish I could make them happen in real them I have friends, I do important things, boyfriends etc...real life sucks so much....
  5. the masked depressant

    the masked depressant Well-Known Member

    i do this to

    i kind of have a soap opera and when things get too much, i just play out another episode
  6. kuriheartsyou

    kuriheartsyou Member

    I used to do that a lot up until my sophomore year of high school. It's pretty much like an intense day dream. I always created characters for different video games or anime and pretended that I was that person, changing up the story or continuing it like I would have wanted.

    It was quite the effective escape until it started to affect my schoolwork ">_> I couldn't concentrate in class. Eventually I had to force myself to let go of the alternate universe I had in my head.
  7. Megz

    Megz Active Member

    Firstly PHEW! I really did think that I was maybe totally off the wall with this one, I do keep my fantasy life where it belongs but yes, do retreat into it at times when life becomes too much - which is not always convenient, but I can concentrate it's just in periods of down time or during times when I don't need 100% concentration that I go there. I don't even know that I want to stop it all together - it does provide me with some respite, but it scares me when I start to do it more and avoid real life, pretending i'm ill or ignoring social events etc so that I can do it.

    I have written some 'stories' but they usually involve inserting another, better version of myself into an established place, with established characters and the writing the story from there. I always kind of considered it 'wish fulfillment' but I have put some of them on the net. It feels a bit like cheating though - taking an established 'world' and cast of characters created by someone else and then adding another character and sending them off on adventures. I have tried doing original stuff but the only character that is really believable is the morphed one of me! I tend to make the 'good' characters more like angels and the 'bad' ones more like the Devil incarnate!
  8. Megz

    Megz Active Member

    Yes this is exactly what I do, might think that I'd have grown out of it by now though! Is it an age thing? More common in younger people?
  9. morning rush

    morning rush Well-Known Member

    I don't know, I'm 28 years old now so...I don't think its an age thing, maybe its an intelligence thing...
  10. Megz

    Megz Active Member

    I'm 31 so yes, an intelligence thing maybe rather than age, if it helps and as long as we know the difference between fantasy and reality maybe I'm not as screwed up as I thought - rather I'm using my imagination to make myself feel better?

    Thanks Guys :)

    My fantasy life usually depends on what I'm in to at the time, in my head I have toured with world famous bands, been in a very well known book/film series as if it were real life, been in an 80's cult film, a long running and well known tv drama series......... anyone else willing to share?
  11. HakunaMatata

    HakunaMatata Well-Known Member

    I usually play out stories that are Sci-Fi or Adventure. I've also noticed i like talking quietly rather than in my head to play out characters. It's usually the good guy versus the bad guy scenario. Just today i blew about half an hour or more playing this story out (that's been built a bit).

    A really smart and old dark-elf finally escaped from his imprisonment. He figured out how he would escape after so many years and in doing so he killed the hunter (another elf) who put him there. - Their fluid had been going on for years, both of them tracking each other to kill. The good hunter trapped the dark-elf, but for some reason didn't kill him. (I then would ponder a few reasons why he wouldn't kill him).

    This good-elf/hunter has a "student" that he's been passing on his skills and knowledge of this world. - This student goes on a rampage trying to find his teacher. In the end it turns out the dark-elf was manipulating things inorder to get this student to become more like him. Ofcourse that turns out not to be the case. Even though the student went on a rampage and broke the hunter rules in the end he still was a good-guy.
    The dark-elf ends up killing him and in doing so becomes even more weak (He's old).

    And of course the story continued that the dark-elf would help a warlock become powerful, but the warlock would also need to transfer the dark-elfs soul into the students body.
    Over time they build this really great friendship, and once the deed has been done the warlock has different views on things. The dark-elf thinks things have to be taken slowly while the warlock is all about rushing things, and he's also wanting to pass his new found knowledge down to build an army.

    The dark-elf gets to keep his ring (which bounces magic off) and this shows that the warlock still holds value to their friendship. Well the dark-elf backs off, but he starts to hear things of the warlock, so he pursues to go look up on his old friend. - Couple of stories short; the dark-elf kills a warlock that's a member of his friends group. And that's what begins another fluid...

    Oh god. I got carried away typing there and then lost a bit of interest towards the end.
  12. DawnB

    DawnB Well-Known Member

    A fantasy life?

    Lately, it's been based on a story that I'm writing. I'm not in it necessarily, but it's like I'm watching the characters interact and the scenes and whatnot. It's mostly comedy-drama, at a city with a group of friends and their issues.

    Now I've always done that for years, though, feeling like I'm watching characters interact.

    Sadly, I can't bring myself to write these ideas down lately either. I'd feel slightly better if I could.
  13. Chargette

    Chargette Well-Known Member

    I'm 54 and I've been dealing with this all my life. It becomes predominant when my stress level is high. It's upsetting that I've dreamed a lot of my life away just because it was a safe place to be because I'm hurting.
  14. Megz

    Megz Active Member

    I was looking around on here and there's another thread similar to this about something called 'Maladaptive Daydreaming' it's in general disorders forum. It gives a little information but I looked up the term. I feel so much better knowing that I'm not the only one who 'hides' in my own head!
  15. spiritxfade

    spiritxfade Well-Known Member

    Yup, I've done this. It's a way to escape reality and it's troubles for me. Most of the time I expound on other works of fiction I'm a fan of. Sometimes I invent from scratch. Mostly I let myself slip into it when I'm alone lying awake in bed and waiting for sleep to come. It's safer that way. No interruptions.
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.