Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by underdosed, Jul 25, 2007.

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  1. underdosed

    underdosed Guest

    i feel fat and worthless. like all the time. i dont want to go to school because everyone is really skinny at my school and i always feel fat. its the school that the book and movie "mean girls" is based off of and i just cant go back there for another 2 years. i want to be in college but surviving these next two years will be hard. sports make it go by so much faster so i guess i will just swim ALL year round to try to pass the time. when im exhausted i dont have as much tim to be alone and dpressed. the endorphins make it better. i HATE school tho. HATE it. i just feel like such an obese loser. i hate myself.
  2. Twisted Sweet Lies

    Twisted Sweet Lies Well-Known Member

    So tell me why is being thin is so important? A lot of my friends are over weight. There's nothing wrong with that. Everyone has something they don't like about the way they look. Why do looks even matter? I'm almost temped to shave my head and dress like a bum to try to prove looks are pointless. People tell me I'm pretty they say I have the perfect body. To me I look sickenly thin. It's gross but again why the hell are looks so important? It's personality that counts.
  3. swimmergirl

    swimmergirl Well-Known Member

    You are an athlete, so I bet you are not really fat, your thoughts are probably just distorted about your body image. Try not to compare yourself to anyone else. I am/was a swimmer in high school and college, and swimmers just don't have those tiny bodies, you wouldn't be a great swimmer if you were super thin! Anyways, the key is to be healthy not just thin!

    hang in there! And try to be kind to yourself!
  4. thething912

    thething912 Well-Known Member

    You not a loser everyone at my school is skinny also.

    I fell fat also.

    Oh well.
  5. resistance

    resistance Staff Alumni

    Swimmergirl has a good point, if you're an athlete then you most certainly aren't fat and you shouldn't compare yourself to anyone else. I know that can be hard in todays day and age, but just because you're not as skinny as those skinny girls it doesn't make you a loser at all. Skinny isn't always attractive anyway, it's best to have a bit of "meat" on you and it is also healthier. I'm sure you have a good figure, if you are worried about your weight then maybe a visit to the doctors for a weight check etc may make you feel better. :hug:
  6. wallflower

    wallflower Well-Known Member

    I feel the same way. I go to stores and I pick out all these cute t-shirts and then I go to try them on and nothing fits! It's so upsetting. Instead of me thinking I'm too fat, I think I'm not and end up being fatter than I think. It's starting to get me down. I want to be that thin pretty girl. That girly tom boy with cute little boyish t-shirts and short hair, I want guys to be attracted to me for my thin waist. I'm not attractive...I'm just average...in fact I'm less than average. I'm too wrong.
  7. underdosed

    underdosed Guest

    but my bmi is a 22.1!!! thats only 2.8 away from being OVERWEIGHT. i hate feeling like people are staring at me because im fat and gross. i hate feeling like a man.

    i know you're trying to make me feel better with the 'looks dont matter' spiel, but think back to when you were in highschool. now imagine that the average size at your school is a 2 or 4 and you're a 6. looks DO matter. first impressions and such are all based on looks. being fat is like being a second class citizen.
  8. jhayes0027

    jhayes0027 Well-Known Member

    Well the first impressions thing can also be based on the person. In today's society people place looks way above what they need too. Being skinny isn't great either though. I look like a toothpick or something. In ways it makes me feel inferior, as if I have no muscle or meat to protect myself with. I've got very very very low self confidence and no self esteem and I can say skinny isn't what it's cracked up to be.

    It sounds more like you may have a bit of a confidence problem as well. I find it hard to work on. You just gotta start thinking in a different mind in a way. Quit thinking about what others may or may not think of you. You shouldn't compare yourself. Something i wish I had thought about in high school that I think about a lot now is that most people from your school you probably will never talk to much after you graduate anyway. There's no since in worrying about what a bunch of people think of you if you aren't going to be around them your whole life anyhow.

    I use to be bad about that til I switched my thoughts around a bit. Now I just don't put so much emphasis on what I think of my physical appearance. You are who you are and everyone is beautiful in their own way. You shouldn't be worried about wanting look like someone else or something different as most likely, they hate the way they are in some form as well and other problems would just arise.
  9. neverdie

    neverdie Guest

    We all have hearts minds and souls. We might look different on the outside, but beauty is only skin deep. There are a lot of people who are considered beautiful, but they have their problems too. Some are shallow, self centered, conceded, egotistical, snobs. I wouldn’t want to be like them.

    I’m happy being fat. If people don’t like the way I look, it’s not my fault, it’s theirs. They are the ones that have a problem. They are the shallow, self centered, conceded, egotistical, snobs.

    So if ur a little over weight, so what, big deal. Be proud, Be happy, and above everything else, have fun in life.
  10. swimmergirl

    swimmergirl Well-Known Member

    So, do you seriously think being a size 2 or 4 will make you happy? Then all of your problems will go away...????

    What is the real issue? It certainly is not just about your body, what is really making you hate yourself so much?

    Believe me, it is never just about your body, or weight or food, there is usually an underlying issue? You have to figure out what it is, and deal with that. If you eat healthy and excercise your weignt will settle where it needs to be.
  11. underdosed

    underdosed Guest

    well my main problem is that i my sister is a size double zero (shes 18, 5' 9", and 125 lbs). shes REALLY smart, pretty, social, athletic, etc and suck compared to her. its hard living in her shadow. so feeling like that at home and then at school im not as good as everyone else. its humiliating and i feel like a mutant all the time. its hard to have confidence when you feel like the ugliest person on the planet. i am constantly thinking like this: "wow her legs are really skinny. you look like a fat sausage. dont eat that. your thighs are huge. your skin is blotchy. your hair looks frizzy. she was staring at you. there must be something on your clothes. if you werent such a fatass you would be a better swimmer. your collar bone doesnt stick out enough. you look like a linebacker. oink oink. something smells. must be you." and on and on and on. how can u make that little voice in your head narrorating how much you suck go away? and if it does go away, i might get fatter and uglier without the voice to keep me in check.
  12. swimmergirl

    swimmergirl Well-Known Member

    Okay, stop COMPARING yourself to your sister! Thinking that way has only caused you pain and suffering. You have to change your thoughts and you need to learn how to love yourself.

    I have an assignment for you, I want you to make a list of at least 5 things that you like about yourself. You have pretty much covered all the things you don't like, so now try to challenge your negative thoughts and focus on the positive things. I know you have some....the fact that you are a swimmer is one awesome thing about you. I am sure there are MANY more! Let's hear them!

    I am waiting.....get to it!
  13. underdosed

    underdosed Guest

    i had to this kind of thing in the unit. it just makes me sad though since i cant really think of anything. i could say im a good friend but what kind of friend keeps secrets and thinks about leaving them? saying im good at school is a lie since im not in all the highest classes. im athletic but im not great. and im still a fatass.

    the only way i can live much longer is if i can fast forward or hibernate through the next 2 years of my life.
  14. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    When calculating BMI, 2.8 points (while it may not seem like a lot) is a HUGE difference! I'm not saying this to make you feel better. I work out a lot and have done a LOT of research on diet and exercise and BMI and ideal weight. 22.1 is a VERY healthy BMI and I'm sure you look great. Don't let the stick figures ruin your impression of yourself! Trust me, every time I'mhanging out with a bunch of guys and somebody like Kate Moss comes on T.V., they all gag. No girl should want to look like a 12 year old boy...it's gross.
  15. pisces-music-girl

    pisces-music-girl Well-Known Member

    We did that in my health class during my freshman year of high school, right around Christmas. My gym teacher looked me in the face and told me that I was in the high part of average for my body fat, and I should consider losing that to be ideal.

    I can say as much as I want to believe it, that looks don't matter. But you've got an excellent point. High school is about image, image, image.

    ((And I can't wait to get to college either- two years to go...))

    Hey, I'm in the higher classes, and let me tell you, sometimes I don't do so great in them anyway. I keep secerts from my friends, too- the very large majority of them don't know I come here, or that I fear I suffer from bipolar disorder. I'm afraid they'll laugh in my face.

    I'm martial artist (like, karate, only I do taekdowndo). I'm not all that great at it either, but since I love it I still do it.

    C'mon, you've got to be good at something- like, calming people down, taking care of animals- I'll bet you're good at something.

  16. silent_enigma

    silent_enigma Well-Known Member

    All I can say is that high school sucks and be glad there's just 2 years left. The social culture that schools fester is just terrible, IMO.

    Anyways, I've been married almost 11 years and my wife has been all sorts of shapes, sizes, and styles (everything from supermodel-esque to giant pregant ball to freaky cult clothing appearance and back). By far, love and its subsequent personality traits are by far the most important thing.

    If she were to die and I could keep from killing myself and everything, I'd definitely not judge potential mates based on size.
  17. Twisted Sweet Lies

    Twisted Sweet Lies Well-Known Member

    I am in high school. I have many friends who are over weight. I don't judge them or anyone else on how they look. A 22.1 bmi is good. In gym class we were told that a normal bmi for a female is 30. The average for a male is less then that.
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