I have come to the conclusion that I hate myself therefore everyone around me must to,right ? I know that isn't realistic thinking but that's how I feel all the time. I always panic that the people I love don't love me because why would they ? I'm always scared that one day they will give up and leave, one day I will push to much and they will just give up. So I try to portray myself in a way I need to,I will be whoever that person wants or needs me to be-which has led me to lose myself. I have a fear of being alone and rejected so I make sure I keep the amount of people I love to a minimum, but I get attached easily. What's worse is I love and hate all the wrong people, I push a way the people I love and Chase softer people who don't care about me.