I'm never going to be what people want me to be... When I was younger I was "too serious"... Now I'm not serious enough... Do you think I want to be like this? My head is never gonna get any older than this weird 11-14 year old thing it is. I'm never gonna have a 'normal' level of maturity for my age because of how things have affected me. I'm never gonna be thin, but maybe I can deal with that. I'm never gonna be pretty, but if you think that I'm gonna plaster my face in make-up to make you happy, think again. You might not think I should do that with my hair, but it's my hair and not yours. But you know what? I feel like giving up and just let you decide everything for me, cos the '14 year old' part of me can't keep fighting everyone like this, and the '11 year old' never learned to stick up for herself. So I'll let everyone else take over, and neither the 11 or 14 year olds will be here anymore. Just my 20 year old shell.