I'm in college right now, and I've halted all my studies because I don't anticipate being around much longer. I've stopped caring, I just continue to elaborate on my plan to kill myself. I've been struggling so much, but I've been thinking of little things to keep me alive -- how I want to see the next episode of Conan O'Brien's new talk show, how I need to feed my fish, how I want to go to Disneyland first. But these thoughts keeping me clinging to life keep getting less and less frequent. More and more, all I can think about is killing myself. I thought I was getting a little better, until I got in a huge fight with my boyfriend just now. We're verging on breaking up because I don't know whether or not I should tell him about my suicidal thoughts. I keep starting arguments with him because of my suicidal feelings. He doesn't know, he thinks I am just arguing with him. He is one of the reasons that I am hanging on. I fear that when we are done, I will be done. But he's going through a lot of personal problems of his own; his family is falling apart and he recently lost his best friend in a car accident and we have been arguing a lot outside of reasons due to my suicidal thoughts as well. I don't want to bring my suicidal thoughts into the picture because of these things, he is already going through a lot. But he keeps getting fed up with me arguing with him. I can tell he is growing tired of me, and that makes me feel closer and closer to death. I don't know if I should tell him, I have NO ONE to talk to, if there is anyone it would be him, but I don't know if I should.