feeling desperate

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by mjj, Apr 23, 2016.

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  1. mjj

    mjj Member

    My boyfriend of four years constantly breaks up with me, blocks my number, I look crazy then he eventually comes back saying he was just tired or angry. I can't live this way anymore
     
  2. ThePhantomLady

    ThePhantomLady Safety and Support SF Supporter

    I'm sorry you're being put through this. It must be incredible hard to deal with!

    No one should have to live like that, he sounds like he has his own issues.
    Have you talked to him about what is going on? Does he seem manipulative? or?

    Please be safe hun, you come first, you are important. You matter!
     
  3. mjj

    mjj Member

    He suffers from lack of sleep but takes everything out on me. He is away on a two week army course and we've been in contact everyday counting the days as we are still mad about each other. Last week I decided to go for a meal and drinks with a friend. As his phone is switched off I waited until he called to tell him my whereabouts. He blocked me and told me I was deceitful. He's just left me wondering what I've done wrong. I suffer from anxiety and panic attacks and he makes this worse. I've no means to contact him but it goes the same way...i email him lengthy one sided conversations and leave 5min voicemails from withheld numbers. I look pathetic and desperate. I panic and probably look mental to him.
     
  4. mjj

    mjj Member

    I've attempted suicide in the past and he uses this against me for future rows. I can't say how I feel because he says go on then you'll probably kill yourself now
     
  5. ThePhantomLady

    ThePhantomLady Safety and Support SF Supporter

    I'm sorry to say this, but he sounds very manipulative hun. And you deserve better than that!
     
    Aryanna likes this.
  6. mjj

    mjj Member

    Yes. He is amazing when I am with him but soon as I'm doing my own thing I'm hated and blocked. I wait and wait for him to call. I'm waiting for a email :(....nothing for days.
     
  7. Inspire&Inquire

    Inspire&Inquire SF Supporter

    He doesn't seem manipulative to me, the way you present him, he seems paranoid and untrusting. Every time you go out on your own he seems to assume the worst.
     
    mjj likes this.
  8. mjj

    mjj Member

    Then what can I do to help him?
     
  9. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    He seems either paranoid or jealous or both. Tell him to get help, real help because you cannot go on with a future like that. He either gets help or your relationship will be destroyed, no one deserves to be treated the way he is treating you. I'm sorry you are going through this *hugs* I was once in a similar relationship, itdidn't end well to say the least. I hope ye can move forward together and enjoy ye're time together but he must accept responsibility and get help. Best of luck to you. You did nothing wring, please keep telling yourself that because it is true.
     
    mjj likes this.
  10. mjj

    mjj Member

    After 30 calls I got though he told me he didn't trust me and stopped loving me and kept hanging up. He won't let me speak at al but is abusive. He makes me want to die
    .
     
  11. mjj

    mjj Member

    He knows I'm a fool
     
  12. Inspire&Inquire

    Inspire&Inquire SF Supporter

    Regardless of what he is or isn't it doesn't seem like a healthy relationship for you or him.
     
    mjj likes this.
  13. Aryanna

    Aryanna New Member

    If you had a very good friend going thru this very same thing....what would you say to her?
    If you knew for a fact that you only have one more week to live...how would you want to spend your remaining time?
    What would you say to your good friend who only had a week to live??
    That she should spend it chasing after this guy who treats her so badly?
     
  14. mjj

    mjj Member

    I've surprised myself because before him I would not understand why the hell someone could make you feel.so low and pathetic...and this isn't my first love so I'm not experiencing love for the first time. I'm up and down. One moment I'm living in the moment thinking every girl has been through a tuff time then the next moment I need him back and I'm acting crazy, doing things I normally wouldn't and like a walking zombie off diazepam sometimes. It's how he makes me feel....if anyone else even tried it I wouldn't react but he's trained my mind into needed him. Maybe I am being pathetic but until you experience something big or small it doesn't make sense
     
  15. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hi again,

    Do you take Diazepam daily? I am on it too and I find it very helpful. You're not a fool, blinded by love maybe, why is this guy worth all the hassle? (No judgement there, just curious), you deserve someone who will treat you with love, honesty and respect. I think if you look hard enough you will figure out the answers yourself. You don't need him in your life, you have your own issues to deal with and as the saying goes charity starts at home. I wish you all the best and hope you can get through this difficult time!
     
    mjj likes this.
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