Feeling down, tryied talking but no one seems to understand

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by desperatemind, Sep 26, 2010.

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  1. desperatemind

    desperatemind New Member

    I have now felt down for many weeks, have been on tablets for a few weeks after seeing the doctor because of scary thoughts that I was having. Tried talking to the person that is supposed to be there for me, my girlfriend, but she now doesn't even look me in the eyes and hardly talks to me. I have no family, lost everyone over the past 6 years, one by one, only have a 2 year old daughter, who I worship but it's not enough. Everything is getting to me, the noise, the laughter, the cries, the needs. I want to be alone but then I don't. I want to sit in a dark room, but there's no escape. I want someone to be around me and hug me all of the time, but there's no one. What is the point anymore. I have no one to turn to, and am slowly loosing the will to live. Lived my life trying to make people happy and doing the right thing even when they treated me badly but there's no one there for me now, now that I need someone. Feel like there is a weight on my chest that just won't go away. Feel tired and sleepy all of the time and the relief I get is when I'm asleep, but then wake up many times during the night and each time I wake up I feel alone and scared. What can I do to get out of this mess?
     
  2. stig

    stig Well-Known Member

    Hi desperate, I know how you feel, I have been like this for 30 years. firstly it often takes 4-6 weeks for the meds to kick in so stay with it. I go to a blokes self help group every week, it is a room full of guys with mental health problems who support each other, very much like this forum. anyway, every man in that room has been through what you are going through with your girlfriend. i think that the problem is that our girlfriends don't know how to deal with seeing their partner suffering, they pull away. they don't understand that we need help and support. Obviously i don't know your situation. are you able to get away for a weekend? go and have a chill out and try and get your thoughts together. that will give you a break from the gf and your daughter. trust me though it does get easier to deal with. if you feel the need to talk feel free to pm me
     
  3. markab

    markab New Member

    i no how u feeling mate i feel like that all the time my way out is drinking am drinking that much now am about to lose my job that stops the killing myself thoughts in my head i have 2 boys 2 think about never mind the girlfriend she doesnt care anymore this the first time i have been on here and dont no what 2 do so ur not alone
     
  4. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hey i am glad you went to doctors for help It does take up to 6 weeks before the meds work fully if you do not see improvement by then ask for a different med okay. it took me a couple tries but i now feel better I hope you continue to talk here let thoughts out so they don't get all built up inside you. I think when meds kick in you will start having more energy as well take care
     
  5. desperatemind

    desperatemind New Member

    thanks guys.

    Stig, i appreciate your words. I just can't bear to go on though. It's like I'm actively sorting loose ends up, to not leave behind a massive mess so that my girlfriend doesn't seem overwhelmed too much. I look at my daughter, and all i do is cry, knowing i'm not going to be around.

    Mark, have started to drink a few nights ago. Had almost stopped after the little one was born, but it seems like a comfort now. I have so much going on though, these tablets are making me feel as though I can't think properly and if I drink on top of that I'm just not going to be able to perform at even the rate I am now.

    Violet, thank you for your support. I am trying my best. Don't think I'm getting anywhere though. feels like 1 step forward and ten back.
     
  6. kayleigho86

    kayleigho86 New Member

    Hey i know its easy enough coming from someone else sometimes to tell you advice an stuff like from me for example but its worth a try =) i mean is there anything you wanna do with your life you know a dream job or anything like that i mean if you try not to think of the bad so much n even try to think of one good thing an aim yourself a goal towards it try the simplist of things to take your mind off stuff .. yeah most people think if i end it the pain will end but then again you'll never know if the pain would go without doing somethin drastic and youd be able to live the rest of yourlife like every other person its worth a shot just give yourself a chance people under estimate themselves to much .. i know its not very good advice but i jus wanted to try
     
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