Feeling down.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Ellie Grey, May 13, 2013.

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  1. Ellie Grey

    Ellie Grey Well-Known Member

    Right now I really want to end it. I say that often online (not ever in real life) and I never do it.
    So I guess I shouldn't be posting, I don't know where else to turn though.
    I try and ask for help and immediatly I'm "Shallow, and an attention seeker"
    I can't even be who I am without people sneering or finding fault.

    There is absolutely no help available for me. Too many times have people said no, over and over again.
    And yet I live every day and just want to end it.
    And right now, I feel so fucking lonely and sick.
    All I do is read and play video games, the only time I'm around people is school, for 2 hours. Then I'm alone.
    I just feel like I should end it.
     
  2. lufluf

    lufluf Member

    Hi Ellie, i just want to say I'm here and listening to your post. You are not alone, please don't give in and fight, someone will help. If you ever need someone to speak to you can always pm me.
     
  3. Duskhound

    Duskhound Member

    I know how you feel, Ellie. I think probably most of us on here do. It's hard to get up every day, look in the mirror, and say "Today's gonna be great! YEAH!!" *cue rainbows exploding from eyes*

    But there are people out there, like us, who won't scorn you for feeling the way you do, and won't bash you as an "attention seeker". Ultimately, those who say things like that tend to simply not understand, and we can't blame them for not understanding. It sounds like to me you just gotta find that someone who you find yourself in; the person who makes you feel glad to be alive and strong enough to look in the mirror and shot rainbows from your eyes.

    Whether it's a best friend or something more, as the old saying goes, "there's someone out there for everyone." You haven't found em yet, but they're out there, and they'll come when you need them most, and when you'd least expect it.

    Til then, chin up, put on a brave face, and just try to enjoy the little things; enjoy your youth! Have fun, get out there, meet new people, do stupid (but safe) things while you still can. There's a lot of world for us to explore, and there's always something new to find, like someone with rainbow eye lasers. Haven't seen it yet, but you never know what you might find!
     
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