Feeling Guilty and Helpless

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I don't even know where to begin. I just feel so horrible, because not only am I ruining my own life, I'm hurting the people I love most as well. I don't even know how all these bad feeling have escalated so much. I guess that's what keeping them inside does. I just wish there was something I could do to make things better for everyone else. The one thing I want to do - take myself out of the equation - will only make it worse. I am to blame for so much pain, and yet there's nothing I can do to make it better. Nothing. I feel like I'm living in a dream world. Nothing seems real anymore. My emotions seem dulled. Life seems so empty. I would take my life if I could, but this would only bring more heartache to my loved ones, so in the end, no matter what I do, I'll be causing pain to people I care about. I've been slowly trying to take myself away from people I was once close with. I don't have any close friends anymore. A few key individuals are all that stands between myself and death. If only I could separate myself from them without causing them pain. I apologize to anyone's time I have just wasted by making them read this nonsense. My own mind is too fed up with my complaining.


Staff Alumni
hi michelle...we are not fed up reading so please keep posting...sorry you are feeling so awful, but know we are here for you and that you count!!! please PM me if i can be there for you...big hugs and caring thoughts
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