feeling hopeless

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by chickee, Nov 14, 2010.

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  1. chickee

    chickee Active Member

    I can't shake this feeling. I am so upset and unhappy with so little hope in my life. I have a job, I have a husband and a house and a tiny support system. I SHOULD be happy. However, I am absolutely miserable beyond comprehension. Please don't send me any hatred notes about how you don't have a husband etc because that doesn't fix the problem of depression.

    I have plotted ways of ending my life and I can't find the "perfect method" which frustrates me. I just keep thinking about it and these thoughts seem to invade me every day.

    I don't have an appt with my psych till the end of November and i don't see a therapist (had a few bad experiences, one overstepped boundaries and the other just wasn't right for me). can anyone offer any suggestsions? does this go away???????
     
  2. In Limbo

    In Limbo Forum Buddy

    First off you won't get hatred here for your situation, if you do then people will be banned.

    I'm pleased to hear you're on the psych path as it were, I'd keep looking for that therapist that's right for you - I tend to think it's mostly down to personalities and styles meshing.

    Does your husband know the extent of your feelings? I suggest if you're able that you let him know that. Are you on any medication?
     
  3. chickee

    chickee Active Member

    He knows and he is scared. it's almost too much for him to take in but he doesn't want to lose me to suicide. I feel like such a burden and I worry about what he thinks of me (being unstable etc). I need to get through this dark time but I feel so out of resources. My last therapist was really nice but her approach to therapy was not my style. Too much EMDR and too little CBT or DBT for that matter.

    I don't have anyone on the horizon. I just keep sitting around all day thinking about ways to die.
     
  4. In Limbo

    In Limbo Forum Buddy

    OK, first of all you're not a burden. You're merely a person who is ill. Depression is an illness - never lose sight of the fact that it's not because of you. Don't feel guilty because of your situation, illness and depression in particular does not discriminate.

    Keep looking for the help, even if it seems hopeless. Luck changes. Do you take any form of anti-depressants to stabilise your mood? Do you have anything that you enjoy doing to improve your state of mind?
     
  5. chickee

    chickee Active Member

    thanks for talking to me. i am on prozac and abilify and both seem to be ineffective right now

    what i used to enjoy I dont enjoy anymore. i just want to sleep and get up to eat.
     
  6. In Limbo

    In Limbo Forum Buddy

    Have you told your doctor that you don't feel the meds are working - they may well prescribe you something else if that's the case. I find that writing stuff down also helps to earth some of the more intense feelings when I've gotten low in the past. What's your job and do you enjoy it/have many friends in it?
     
  7. jasonkramer

    jasonkramer Well-Known Member

    why are you so absolutely miserable beyond comprehension?

    you have a husband, support net work and a house, what else do you need to be happy?

    those 2 questions are basically the short versions of what any doc will ask you.

    have you tried any mental exorcises to aid your meds like meditation or affirmations?

    the good thing though is it sounds like you haven't hit rock bottom yet. if you still want to at least get up and eat so there's still tones of hope. i can remember being to the point i couldn't care less of i ate pizza or cardboard.
     
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