feeling it will never get better

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by justastrangegirl, Sep 8, 2016.

  1. justastrangegirl

    justastrangegirl Well-Known Member

    lately i've been feeling really depressed and been having suicidal thoughts the past few days... i left everything behind, which was not much since i dont have friends, to come to a different country to study and to be with somebody i liked, but even so, im not happy.. im still the same friendless quiet girl as usual, and i dont fit in because im not into getting high, drunk and partying.. are these things really THAT important to people nowadays?? only because i dont enjoy harming my body and being ditched at parties when "friends" find someone to make out with, does it mean i will always be alone and rejected??
     
  2. Rockclimbinggirl

    Rockclimbinggirl SF climber Staff Member Safety & Support

    Hugs. Are you in college/uni? What about trying to join clubs to meet people? Does your school have a counsellor?
     
  3. justastrangegirl

    justastrangegirl Well-Known Member

    Yes Im at university. Societies here are rather pointless, the level of student involvement/participation is extremely low. International student advisors couldnt care less about us, and I even tried booking an appointment with the school's therapist months ago but she never replied my email
     
  4. Rockclimbinggirl

    Rockclimbinggirl SF climber Staff Member Safety & Support

    Can you email the counsellor again? What about seeing a doctor?
     
  5. Frances M

    Frances M Mountain Woman

    I felt awkward at university. I wasn't into the all night drug and drinking parties either. All I wanted to do was go home and study, sleep, eat and start all over again. It's unfortunately the mentality of a lot of college and university kids. I hope you can find some like-minded friends at some point. I can't suggest how though because I chose to be alone. I would also email the counselor again, or go to her office.
     
  6. justastrangegirl

    justastrangegirl Well-Known Member

    I cant see a doctor because as an international student my insurance is only valid during school, and anyway, its impossible to get a doctor here in Canada. Where I am, there are no doctors who are accepting patients. I emailed the counsellor twice and never heard back, I dont know if she doesnt work at school or what. And Frances, I choose to be alone before being in bad company as well.. its just that Im getting tired of being alone and practically having no one to talk to when I need to
     
  7. Rockclimbinggirl

    Rockclimbinggirl SF climber Staff Member Safety & Support

    Does your school have a health clinic or any resources they can give you? What about community clinics that have counselling?
     
  8. Frances M

    Frances M Mountain Woman

    I'm in Canada too and I sympathize with your frustration at the doctor situation. I'm a resident here and still on a darn waiting list...I just go to clinics, what about the hospital emergency? Does your insurance cover that? Many people here use the emergency room as a clinic because they can't find doctors otherwise, it just takes a lot of patience to wait.

    I understand that you feel alone. All I can say is that when I feel absolutely alone, I post here. I can't trust "real life" people anymore. It gives me some kind of comfort knowing that I will more than likely have a reply waiting for me the next time I log in. I can't even begin to suggest anything for meeting people, I'm just not good at that.
     
  9. electricalanomaly

    electricalanomaly too sad to say hi.

    It's possible, not everyone is into partying and getting high and drunk. Be patient, and you might find people with similar interest as you and surround yourself with them. If you are still feeling terrible, have you tried going for long walks, going to gym, biking, hiking and engage in exercise? I found these to lift my spirits at least temporarily and given me a more positive outlook for work.

    Is it possible to visit the counselors office and make the appointment in person? Not getting a reply, if you are taking this personal, please don't. I am sure there is a logical reason.

    I'm a loner, no friends. always tired and depressed. I can't get along well with people....but doggies i do well. lol!!!

    I'm just trying to help, hope i don't offend anyone.
     
    Frances M likes this.