Feeling less than adequate...

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by KittyGirl, Aug 16, 2010.

  1. KittyGirl

    KittyGirl Well-Known Member

    I don't really know.
    Today is just a bad day, I guess...
    Over the past week or so, my little brother and step-sister have suddenly been acting like best friends. I'll just say that they have never gotten along before. In the 2 years that they'd been 'forced' to live together, she would frequently yell at him for no reason and make mean comments out of nowhere. That type of behavior hasn't stopped, so I wonder--- why is he putting up with her in his personal life as well as his home life?
    Why does he feel that he can hang out with her all day long; go out to parties, get drunk with her (and the rest of his friends, mind you) and have fun with her?
    I don't understand how they can suddenly be best friends all of a sudden.
    I'm glad they're getting along, I guess-- that's great... but I've always been the big sister who he could tell anything to and now he doesn't need me anymore.
    I feel horrible.
    I feel jealous of her and kind of odd that she's stolen my brother away...

    Then again; I'm not really jealous that her only friends are a bunch of 15-16 year olds and she is 21.
    She's kind of mean spirited and rude and very immature. Maybe that's why she 'gets along' with them?
    It's kind of weird.

    I guess if I was truly feeling jealous, I could always try to make friends my own age instead of being all alone-in my bedroom- every day.

    I just feel so inadequate- put next to basically any other person I can think of.
    I'm just a weed in the flower garden of life.
  2. Ihatemyselfalot

    Ihatemyselfalot Banned Member


    I don't know how to phrase this without it sounding interrogating or rude, but..

    How do you know he is sharing with here rather than just hanging out?

    I don't think you have been replaced, because you are his sis. :)
  3. Escapist

    Escapist Well-Known Member

    Perhaps your brother has just matured through her immaturity and rude behaviour and tries to just look past that. I understand that it must be difficult to suddenly deal with this, especially because it looks like that your sister took your brother away from you. However, irritations are always around and could lead to a argument between the two. Which could be your chance to talk with your brother.

    Well. Generally it wouldn't be a bad idea to ask him why he's putting up with this? It might give you a better idea of the situation at hand and you might be able to respect it a tad more than that you do now. In the end, he has two sisters. Both which deserve his attention. Right? Maybe it's just a phase. Though talk with him, try too atleast. He seems to be important to you, don't let him slide just like that, not without knowing what exactly changed or is going on.

    Hang in there. :hug:
  4. KittyGirl

    KittyGirl Well-Known Member

    Mom ended up asking him why he's been spending so much time with the step-sister; because it really is that strange that he would be hanging out with her suddenly.
    He and mom moved in with mom's boyfriend and his two daughters 2 years ago. "the step sister" has been violent, rude and all around not very pleasant toward him because she is a self proclaimed man-hater.

    He told her that he doesn't think of her as a family member, so he can tell her things and do things with her that he would normally get a lecture for- from mom and I.
    He thinks of me as a mom, and not as an older sister that he can tell anything because mom and I raised him together. When I was 7, I took on the role of the perpetual babysitter - and even though there's no need for me to babysit him, or try to teach him things anymore, he will always think of me in that way.
    As a mom.

    So now that he's a teenager and does really stupid things and says really stupid things and has secrets; he can't tell me his silly 'little' secrets like when he was a kid -- now he has to keep to himself because I'd probably scold him and tell him what he did was pretty stupid.
    His stepsister would laugh and tell him to do whatever he wanted because she isn't responsible for him... and she also does really stupid things on a regular basis and doesn't think of the consequences.