I'm so tired, so tired of feeling unpredictable, so tired of mood cycling, so tired of everything. Due to my failures with mental health services, and yes I have shouted LOUD but it has not got me anywhere, I just don' see the point in continuing to fight. Lets face it, they want me dead. They don't care. I can't get better all by myself, but all they have done is made everything worse. I cannot live like this anymore, the only way out is if they miraculously have a change of heart (not gonna happen) or I die. No brainer really. Nothing else matters, I don't care about the devastation, I just do not care anymore.